George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[The Professor]

well, I'm back from my cruise of the
Bahamas, where I made it as far as
The edge of the Bermuda Triangle...I can
Confirm that Noorys signal fades by that
Point, and beyond lies a vast Noory free
Sea...this also leads me to a new theory
Of the Bermuda Triangle...rather than a
Place where travellers were lost to a mysterious
Malevalent Force,  I think they realized it
Was Noory-free, and having found Noorvana-on-earth,
They simply chose to stay there and never return. I might
Have joined them myself, had I not discovered that
True Noorvana is a state of mind, not a place on earth...
Plus there is still knapp once a month outside the triangle...

[The Professor]

...I also managed to pick up some
Nasty virus on the cruiseship, which
Laid me up in bed the last three days...
Fortunately, I was too sick to listen
On Friday, and then thankfully had two
Nights of not-noory to pass the time in
Bed...however, I must say, ian with nutball
David sereda on Saturday night was
A performance that should win ian a
"Noory" award...Ian spent the interview
Doing his best Noory impersonation,
Letting the nuball babble on with nary
An interruption...about the time the guest
Said yogi masters can materialize gold, and
Ian just gave it a bland affirmation, you
Could tell he checked out of this interview
Long before...Ian simply cannot do
Nutballs anymore, ever since Noory came
Down hard on him for booting maurice-the-godfarher-of-soul-voltage cotterell
and Steve they-might-be-giants Quayle, Ian
Has been Nooritized for the nutballs protection...

Sunday was fine, tho, sinceche had a sane guest...

[danDNA]

dont be fooled!! GN reads this site, he is such an egomaniac he wants to know what people think about him, but he would never grace us with a response, cus he pretends not to care about us, but really he is seething that he didnt buy up this site name. George Norry sucks balls.

[MABUSE]

Ian simply cannot do
Nutballs anymore, ever since Noory came
Down hard on him for booting ... Steve they-might-be-giants Quayle...

Now wait a minute!
I LIKE "They Might be Giants"!
Hell, its from them I got my signature line!

**M**

[The Professor]

Now wait a minute!
I LIKE "They Might be Giants"!
Hell, its from them I got my signature line!

**M**

There are no coincidences....is there a version of your Ferreyesque
Avatar poster that instead of SHILL says
DOPE...I think noory could use it for
His 2012 presidential campaign, which seems to
Be revving up now, with Noron weighing in
Ever more frequently and stupidly on
Political issues of the day...

[The Professor]

Although, I'm guessing your current poster
Is just one of your "SHILL GIANT" series,
Which always feature Noorys iconic Mug,
As he is the Andre the Giant of shilling...

[EvB]

Welcome back Professor!

[PB the Deplorable]

As he is the Andre the Giant of shilling...

And the Hulk Hogan of lazy dumbness... no steroids needed...

[The Professor]

And the Hulk Hogan of lazy dumbness... no steroids needed...

I think there is a lesser known drug called snooroids that
They use to keep George at the most elite level of boring moronic shilling, and
They also dose Ian with it for certain guests...in the industry, relying on snooroids
To achieve dumbed down coporate shill radio is referred to as
"duncing", as in

"no one could be as moronic and boring as Noory
Naturally, you can tell he's duncing bigtime!"

[PB the Deplorable]

I think there is a lesser known drug called snooroids that They use to keep George at the most elite level of boring moronic shilling, and They also dose Ian with it for certain guests...in the industry, relying on snooroids To achieve dumbed down coporate shill radio is referred to as "duncing"

Associated Press
August 10, 2009

Noory Denies Duncing With Snooroids

Late night syndicated radio host George Noory has again denied the use of the duncing drug Snooroids.  'That is totally false' said Noory, in an exclusive interview.  'I think my listeners know I do not need these drugs to be the boring moronic shill that they have come to expect of me'. 

Noory went on to say that he has his producer frequently inject him in the ass with a cocktail of Aspartame, Tumeric, Formaldehyde, and 'any vaccine that alarmist Alex Jones is currently warning about'.

While admitting his producer has in the past injected him with with Botox instead of his normal cocktail, Noory claims that 'was done in jest', and added that he had been his usual zombie like self during the show, so it did not effect his performance.  'It was actually nice to be wrinkle free for a few weeks', the show host added with a wink.

[The Professor]

I'm not buying Noorys denial, he's got all the physical
Signs of heavy snooroid use...turns hair grey (users often
Try to cover this with shoepolish), droopy facial features,
Milktoast physique,  severely  shrunken frontal lobes, and a hugely
Inflated, massive, buldging ego...

Beyond that, he frequently flies into
The classic "snoid rage", where the user
Raves about why are"THEY" doings this to us?!?  And
Brings up angels, portals, 2012, shadow rodents and
Ratings compulsively...

[The Professor]

I'm sick with a flu, I'm a microbiologist, and I mentioned Steve They-might-be-giants Quayle last night,
And now Quayle is on with Snoron tonight talking about Flu, dead microbiologists and Giants! Nooooooooooooooo!!!!

Why are the Gods punishing me!?!?!!!

I can't decide whether to listen to the show, or peel off my
Sunburned skin...maybe if I drink all my codeine caugh syrup
First, the show would be sensible and interesting...

[TheAntiGeorgie]

I wonder how much they got him for?  And what is this radio hall of fame crap.......


http://www.radiohof.org/

[Supernormal]

Welcome back, Prof'. I'm sorry to hear that you got sick during your trip. If it's any consolation, a lot of us got sick on Friday night when Noory asked an old woman to talk in a deep voice like Ross Mitchell (not kidding). Get out the Maalox before Steve Quayle talks about evil giants and the Swine Flu.

[The Professor]

Will noory do the drudge story about the dead infant
That woke up at his funeral? Doubtful, That story seems very
Out of character for George...

[Supernormal]

Well, he did also say, and has said before, that he spends 'no' time on the things in the Bible that would 'marginalize' certain people (paraphrasing here).

So I think he is saying that he selectively ignores some parts of the Bible he doesn't agree with (perhaps not all), and/or focuses on what he is interested in, or finds uplifting.

Likely most religious people of whatever faith do this to some extent - I'm happy to have him state where he stands, without making too big of a deal out of it.

I thought that it might have been part of a larger pattern. It takes me back to what you said about Namibia. I was approaching it from that angle rather than trying to start a debate about religion and/or homosexuality. You might recall the time when Ian claimed that the victims in the Tuskegee Experiment were *injected* with gonorrhea.

[Supernormal]

Noory no longer tells dead baby stories. He's graduated to adolescents now. He just read two dead teenager articles in a row. The first one dealt with a road-rage murder, and the second one dealt with a python attack.

[The Professor]

Wow, Noory did an oddly compelling reading
About the man so hairy he can't get a date...I sensed
Real empathy there...

[Supernormal]

...I also managed to pick up some
Nasty virus on the cruiseship, which
Laid me up in bed the last three days...
Fortunately, I was too sick to listen
On Friday, and then thankfully had two
Nights of not-noory to pass the time in
Bed...however, I must say, ian with nutball
David sereda on Saturday night was
A performance that should win ian a
"Noory" award...Ian spent the interview
Doing his best Noory impersonation,
Letting the nuball babble on with nary
An interruption...about the time the guest
Said yogi masters can materialize gold, and
Ian just gave it a bland affirmation, you
Could tell he checked out of this interview
Long before...Ian simply cannot do
Nutballs anymore, ever since Noory came
Down hard on him for booting maurice-the-godfarher-of-soul-voltage cotterell
and Steve they-might-be-giants Quayle, Ian
Has been Nooritized for the nutballs protection...

Sunday was fine, tho, sinceche had a sane guest...

He picked up a second Noory interviewing technique, which often is based on Noory's Razor*. He sounds more skeptical when he interviews *credible* guests. He seemed to question last night's guests more than he did Maurice and Steve (after the big change).

Noory's Razor: "The least likely explanation is the most likely explanation."

[Marc.Knight]

I am sure there are existing psychological studies in this area, but I believe that Nooron truly hates his job.  His reaction to many guests and topics betrays a dislike for many things paranormal.  Therefore his lack of authenticity and interest shines through like a supernova.  I think many of us have stayed with jobs we hated just for the money or security.  Nooron has tapped into a broad Springeresque audience, therefore the ratings remain intact.  That type of audience, however, is fickle, and soon loses interest.  In the end, it will take Art Bell to intervene to restore the soul of C2C.  He's done it before. 

[The Professor]

Jeez, sounds like the sped up the
Format again to try to compensate
For Noory being so boring... In the first 10
Minutes, read Drudge, and had two
Phone in guests, shill break and then to phone calls...
I always thought the show would end up
With 320 guests per night, each getting a
Howewe arrere yewwwe from Nooron...

[PB the Deplorable]

I think that Fanthorpe told the stories about the green children and strange footprints each time that he appeared on the show. I'm surprised that Noory didn't ask him to tell the tale of Springheeled Jack. He's like a kid who asks you to read the same book to him for the zillionth time. He does this with other guests, for that matter.

Oh goodie, here we go again with Swine Flu... (not to mention Dead Microbiologists... Giants...) for the zillionth time..


Now he's playing a bumper from the the Beach Boys "I Get Around' >> "I'm gettin' bugged drivin' up and down the same old street..."  Us too, George.

Us too.

[The Professor]

Ha! Noorys razor, brilliant and so true...true to
Form, noorys razor epitomizes the dull mind

[Supernormal]

I am sure there are existing psychological studies in this area, but I believe that Nooron truly hates his job.  His reaction to many guests and topics betrays a dislike for many things paranormal.  Therefore his lack of authenticity and interest shines through like a supernova.  I think many of us have stayed with jobs we hated just for the money or security.  Nooron has tapped into a broad Springeresque audience, therefore the ratings remain intact.  That type of audience, however, is fickle, and soon loses interest.  In the end, it will take Art Bell to intervene to restore the soul of C2C.  He's done it before.

You're likely on the money. I got the same impression a while back. He doesn't seem to share the passion that Bell and Knapp have for the subject. It seems like he feigns interest at times. He's like a generic, vanilla announcer who would bring the same kind of emotions and enthusiasm to anything. I once had a job that wasn't for me, but I  tried to force myself to like it. Maybe that's what's going on here. Let's hope that he moves on to something that he likes more.

[The Professor]

The Hopi said we shouldn't bring
Rocks back from the moon because
It's not natural?...uh, George, the
Moon CAME from the earth...

I want to hear what the Hopi say about
Georges PR photos...

[MABUSE]

Professor!

Good to see you!  Sorry you are unwell, try to avoid the noory necrotizing fasciitis known as C2C, I find my nausea goes away completely when I don't listen.  (of course I also drink a LOT less when I am not up all night listening to that clown, so there may be a connection there as well--no coincidences)  I, for one, am going to have a little Josephine Baker mini-film festival and then off to bed!  Hope to find you this weekend and DO, please, get feeling better!

**M**

[PB the Deplorable]

... Get out the Maalox before Steve Quayle talks about evil giants and the Swine Flu.

Someone should call in and relate the Swine Flu epidemic'pandemic to some movie that turns out well.  If nothing else George will sleep easier...

[The Professor]

I hope Noory does a Paula Abdula move soon...

[PB the Deplorable]

George just now:  'these are structures off Cuba on the Golf side'.  Golf side.  I was out gulfing just the other day...

[Supernormal]

Oh goodie, here we go again with Swine Flu... (not to mention Dead Microbiologists... Giants...) for the zillionth time..


Now he's playing a bumper from the the Beach Boys "I Get Around' >> "I'm gettin' bugged drivin' up and down the same old street..."  Us too, George.

Us too.

Did you hear the last half hour of Friday night's show? It was a rerun of a segment with Bob Curran, the Northern Irish author of books on imaginary creatures and legendary places. Noory asked him to tell a certain story. I'll give you three chances to guess what it was, and the first two don't count.