The Ashes

[Yorkshire pud]

Mind you, rugby is at least as sexually dubious as wrestling. All that putting heads in between the legs of other men is not my idea of a good time. Find yourself in a pub with a bunch of rugger buggers and you start to understand what Hell might be like.

Was on the good ship Venus, my God you should've seen us, the figurehead was...tra la la la
'

[SciFiAuthor]

Mind you, rugby is at least as sexually dubious as wrestling. All that putting heads in between the legs of other men is not my idea of a good time. Find yourself in a pub with a bunch of rugger buggers and you start to understand what Hell might be like.

Most sports are sexually dubious when you get down to it. Everyone heads out onto a field for a strictly controlled frolic with various sticks and balls and then they go and have a communal shower to top it all off. And that is why I prefer golf -- a game where lazy is good.

[SredniVashtar]

Was on the good ship Venus, my God you should've seen us, the figurehead was...tra la la la
'

(Shudder). And there's another one that goes on for ever and makes no bloody sense at all. Plus 'Swing Low', which is a bit odd, to hear negro spirituals sung by a bunch of quantity surveyors from Surrey.

[SredniVashtar]

Most sports are sexually dubious when you get down to it. Everyone heads out onto a field for a strictly controlled frolic with various sticks and balls and then they go and have a communal shower to top it all off. And that is why I prefer golf -- a game where lazy is good.

I don't know if you have read any P.G Wodehouse, but he wrote a lot of short stories about golf. You might enjoy them, although the terminology is a bit outdated, with talk of niblicks and mashies  and so on.

[Yorkshire pud]

Close-of-play scorecard
Posted at 18:53
England 343-7 (88 overs)

Batsmen: Moeen 26* (38 balls), Broad 0* (7 balls)

Fall of wickets: 7-1 (Lyth 6), 42-2 (Cook 20), 43-3 (Bell 1), 196-4 (Ballance 61), 280-5 (Root 134), 293-6 (Stokes 52), 343-7 (Buttler 27)

Bowling figures: Starc 19-4-84-3, Hazlewood 22-8-70-3, Johnson 20-2-87-0, Lyon 17-4-54-1, Watson 8-0-24-0, Warner 2-0-9-0

England won toss

[Roswells, Art]

oh the accents! I'd like to request this thread be reenacted with the voices of the original posters. Perhaps on the next gabcast.

[SciFiAuthor]

oh the accents! I'd like to request this thread be reenacted with the voices of the original posters. Perhaps on the next gabcast.

Mine's the best. The real English: American. These austrokiwicanaidapoms got nothing. Don't believe me? Switch on Art Bell . . . Dave not so mush . . . much.

[Yorkshire pud]

That's what she said. And by she I mean whoever is captaining England these days.

That's Aussie sledging I think....I recognise the feeble attempt by the Antipodean throwback. Cardiff was chosen so the Aussies had at least some night life; If they ask nicely the local hill farmers will let them have a few minutes with the sheep, well, if the ewes don't turn them down that is.

[Roswells, Art]

Mine's the best. The real English: American. These austrokiwicanaidapoms got nothing. Don't believe me? Switch on Art Bell . . . Dave not so mush . . . much.

Bostonians may have an issue with that. I met one with a very thick accent who claimed it was the original American accent.

P.S. mush...hehe

[SciFiAuthor]

I don't know if you have read any P.G Wodehouse, but he wrote a lot of short stories about golf. You might enjoy them, although the terminology is a bit outdated, with talk of niblicks and mashies  and so on.

I have actually, he was a truly masterful humorist. I'll check out his golf stuff.

[Roswells, Art]

I have actually, he was a truly masterful humorist. I'll check out his golf stuff.

I have as well, I went through a phase where I tried to read everything he wrote. Too bad about his...radio career.

[maureen]

I don't know if you have read any P.G Wodehouse, but he wrote a lot of short stories about golf. You might enjoy them, although the terminology is a bit outdated, with talk of niblicks and mashies  and so on.

Oh, would that we all had our Jeeves!!  Carry on!   

[SciFiAuthor]

Bostonians may have an issue with that. I met one with a very thick accent who claimed it was the original American accent.

P.S. mush...hehe

Funny enough, there is an almost dead accent in Massachusetts, but not Boston, that is believed to be the progenitor of the flat typical American accent. It sounds a lot like mid-Atlantic American English, i.e. Katharine Hepburn, Orson Welles, William F. Buckley.

[SredniVashtar]

I have as well, I went through a phase where I tried to read everything he wrote. Too bad about his...radio career.

Now now, let's have none of that 

Plum wasn't Lord Haw Haw or anything close. That was all part of wartime hysteria, mainly thanks to William Connor of the Daily Mirror, who found a convenient target to offload on. Anyone who knew him knew that he was an innocent, a real case of arrested development, and those broadcasts were just a way of doing what he did best - to try and be humorous, without any understanding of the consequences. Of course, to anyone vaguely normal they wouldn't have touched it with a ten-foot pole, but that was just him. People like Orwell and Waugh stuck up for him at the time, although it took a long time for the British Establishment to forget about it.

[SredniVashtar]

Oh, would that we all had our Jeeves!!  Carry on!   

Indeed, madam.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I have as well, I went through a phase where I tried to read everything he wrote. Too bad about his...radio career.

P.G. Wodehouse was George R. Noory's pen name?  I didn't even know he could read.

[SredniVashtar]

That's Aussie sledging I think....I recognise the feeble attempt by the Antipodean throwback. Cardiff was chosen so the Aussies had at least some night life; If they ask nicely the local hill farmers will let them have a few minutes with the sheep, well, if the ewes don't turn them down that is.

It is is a well-known fact that the Australian marsupial is not only their principal food source, but also their main object for sexual release.

Tip: never go into a restaurant in Sydney and ask for a grilled wombat with extra stuffing.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I love Australian rules football! The umpires are awesome! I started watching this on ESPN back in the early 80's!

They've got Leslie Nielsen down there?

[SredniVashtar]

Close-of-play scorecard
Posted at 18:53
England 343-7 (88 overs)

Batsmen: Moeen 26* (38 balls), Broad 0* (7 balls)

Fall of wickets: 7-1 (Lyth 6), 42-2 (Cook 20), 43-3 (Bell 1), 196-4 (Ballance 61), 280-5 (Root 134), 293-6 (Stokes 52), 343-7 (Buttler 27)

Bowling figures: Starc 19-4-84-3, Hazlewood 22-8-70-3, Johnson 20-2-87-0, Lyon 17-4-54-1, Watson 8-0-24-0, Warner 2-0-9-0

England won toss

I think the game is about even, don't you, YP? It depends on how the Aussies do when it's their turn, of course, but I will be a bit more confident if we can nose above 400. Moeen is way too good to bat at eight, and I hope he gets a chance to make some runs in a proper way and not just throw the bat and run out of partners. I don't know about Broad these days; he used to be almost an all-rounder for a while before he got whacked in the face. I saw him at Lords against NZ and he was trying to be aggressive, and played a few shots, so maybe he can find some form in the end. An hour of him swinging the bat might help his bowling too as he is such a confidence player.

As for Root. Different class. Face of a cherub, heart of an assassin. Even Ballance made a few today. Not quite sure what part of Yorkshire he comes from with that accent  . Perhaps some remote corner cut off from civilization, like those Brazillian rainforest chaps.

[SciFiAuthor]

I have as well, I went through a phase where I tried to read everything he wrote. Too bad about his...radio career.

He was a true victim of circumstance.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Have you ever noticed that there's an uncomfortable elephant in the room regarding the sports the English-speaking world engages in? Cricket and football for most, Americans rejected those silly things and invented baseball and American football which are obviously superior . . . and then there's . . . Canada . . .

Well, that goes without saying  :

[SredniVashtar]

Funny enough, there is an almost dead accent in Massachusetts, but not Boston, that is believed to be the progenitor of the flat typical American accent. It sounds a lot like mid-Atlantic American English, i.e. Katharine Hepburn, Orson Welles, William F. Buckley.

The first time I heard him I thought, 'WTF is going on there?'. I find him ridiculously entertaining, actually. There are all sorts of amusing bits on YouTube with him being weirdly compelling, with that peculiar look he always used to get in his eyes. Very disturbing. Watch him and Gore Vidal going at it and it leaves MMA in the shade.

[Roswells, Art]

Now now, let's have none of that 

Plum wasn't Lord Haw Haw or anything close. That was all part of wartime hysteria, mainly thanks to William Connor of the Daily Mirror, who found a convenient target to offload on. Anyone who knew him knew that he was an innocent, a real case of arrested development, and those broadcasts were just a way of doing what he did best - to try and be humorous, without any understanding of the consequences. Of course, to anyone vaguely normal they wouldn't touched it with a ten-foot pole, but that was just him. People like Orwell and Waugh stuck up for him at the time, although it took a long time for the British Establishment to forget about it.

He was a true victim of circumstance.

“We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.”

― Kurt Vonnegut, Mother Night

I digress, I understand why he did it.

[SciFiAuthor]

Well, that goes without saying  :

Hockey we get. Curling . . . is just odd. 

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Hockey we get. Curling . . . is just odd. 

Oh man, you've got to watch the women's curling during the winter olympics.  Somehow it draws you in and becomes more captivating than any of the other sports.

Oh, and Canadian football and basketball preceeded American football and basketball, sort of

[Roswells, Art]

P.G. Wodehouse was George R. Noory's pen name?  I didn't even know he could read.

Hahahahahaha!

[SredniVashtar]

At time of posting, there is a whole row of Ashes posts, and nary a Falkie in sight. A real blow for civilization, I rather fancy. God knows what Jazmunda is going to make of all this when he wakes up 

[SciFiAuthor]

The first time I heard him I thought, 'WTF is going on there?'. I find him ridiculously entertaining, actually. There are all sorts of amusing bits on YouTube with him being weirdly compelling, with that peculiar look he always used to get in his eyes. Very disturbing. Watch him and Gore Vidal going at it and it leaves MMA in the shade.

He was the strangest dude; a TV political talk host but also a CIA agent. American, perhaps even Arch-American, yet raised in Mexico, France and London and retained bits of all the accents. I'm not even sure most people here understood what the hell he was talking about most of the time, but he just had some kind of magnetism that kept us glued to his show for 40 years. I've seen the one where he threatens to punch Vidal, but there's also one where he debates Noam Chomsky in easily the most murky unclear debate in American television history. And then sometimes his show would just go crazy all of a sudden.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6LZLZ4Rryw

[Roswells, Art]

I think I love this thread.

[SredniVashtar]

He was the strangest dude; a TV political talk host but also a CIA agent. American, perhaps even Arch-American, yet raised in Mexico, France and London and retained bits of all the accents. I'm not even sure most people here understood what the hell he was talking about most of the time, but he just had some kind of magnetism that kept us glued to his show for 40 years. I've seen the one where he threatens to punch Vidal, but there's also one where he debates Noam Chomsky in easily the most murky unclear debate in American television history. And then sometimes his show would just go crazy all of a sudden.

Yes, but he did it in a very Edwardian, Buckleyish way, didn't he? It went something like, 'listen to me, you queer, call me a crypto-Nazi again and I'll sock you in your goddam face'. I remember he threatened to take Chomsky outside too, but he was joking on that occasion (I think, although god knows with that dude).

Talking of Vidal reminds me I picked up a copy of his memoirs the other day and found, when I got home, that they had been signed by the author. They are patchy but worth a read. My favourite part is when he went to a party without his glasses and went to sit down on 'a small ottoman', only to find out it was Truman Capote.