George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Jocko Johnson]

I'm tempted to recommend my most recent book. That one could put anyone to sleep. That said, I have good luck with reading my kindle. Just pick a dry read and go with it. Usually helps me sleep within a half hour. Failing that, a good old shot of whiskey works.

Please do. I for one would love to read something you've written. Unless its a late nite cook book?   If not please do tell if you don't  want it to be public knowledge please send me a pm. I don't think you ever named it before ? I will keep it to myself if you prefer. Who knows...imagine if you are a sci fi author that I already read and love, boy would I feel bad for busting your shoes and giving u a hard time eh?!

[Jocko Johnson]

Oh, come on sci fi.Quit being an apologist for Noory. You continually defend the guy no matter how outrageous his comments are nor how stupid they are as well.

Its not a matter of wanting him to suck ( other than it gives ammunition for those like me who make fun of his comments on a regular basis ). Its really a matter of his sucking consistently for 10 years.

And doing absolutely NOTHING to change it or make things better.

Furthermore, it isn't that hard to put down words on paper or on the screen.

I do it extermperaneously and on the spot.

Its thinking about WHAT you're going to write about that is the problem.

I sincerely doubt Noory wrote any of his own books himself. He doesn't show the intelectual capacity for doing the hard work required by an writer who does it on his own.

I agree 100%.
He put his name on those books nothing else.

Fishy...really this is a GN sucks forum...not a guns and the one guy that constantly defends him. Except of course the one Oates thing which u make sure u always remind us of. Seriously, it is sickening. How could we not think you work for him, are his friend and or are related to the dope. What else could we think. Just come clean...that way at least I d respect you for telling the truth. It's just silly...com on man spill you'll feel much better. I for one would get ur books I love to read and do all the time,  unless of course ur books are;
A Latenite Dipshit Cookbook
Per-vert Worker Lurking in the Nite
How to Count to 3 (with some crazy lady) and I have it on good authority...(from fat-ass stink bag pre-doucher tammy) that there will be a Christmas release...
How to be a Dunce, Fuck Your Friends, Sing and Look Like Roadkill, Be Unable to Talk and Still Be Tremendously Popular in Life.

[Jocko Johnson]

Sure, it all takes time.  George seems to have nothing but time on his hands.  I'd guess he spends his days at PremRat working on whatever needs to be worked on for these other projects.  Which is time he could be spending on show prep.  Instead he makes excuses, like 'I want to hear the material at the same time as the listeners so I can react to it the way they would'.  Except he doesn't.  He's too slow on his feet, as they say, to do that. 

I'd also guess George doesn't have much to do on his days off, especially when he's in LA.  Flying to a convention or to do his 'TV' show fills the time - especially when he ducks out early on Fridays, or just takes the whole day off.


I listened to George's show for a long time.  Having a day job, I didn't listen to the whole show every night - I didn't even do that when Art Bell was on.  I'd usually listen to the opening comments and most of the first hour, and the whole show only when it was a guest or topic I really wanted to hear. 

Doing that, it takes awhile for a person to realize the Full Suckage of George.  Sure, he wasn't Art, and I convinced myself that I was listening for the guests and not for George anyway.  I could live with the malapropos and mispronounced words and lack of knowledge on just about any subject, it was actually pretty funny.

I would wonder why George seemed to be asking random questions instead of just having a conversation, and why he would be constantly interrupting the guests instead of letting them finish their thoughts.  I started to notice he asked everybody the same questions more or less, and his comments like 'amazing', absolutely', 'so true' 'riveting' etc often didn't even make sense.


Then came the time he had a guest on I was really looking forward to.  George was doing everything he could think of to ruin it - interrupting, asking the same questions several times, asking things the guest had already answered.  He asked the guest to tell one story and cut him off just before he got to the end of it.  Several times the guest would say something astonishing and instead of following up, George would just go on to his next boring cue card question.  After about the third one of those, I actually wanted to throw my radio against the wall.  That was the night I thought about it, put it all together, and realized he pretty much did those same things with every show.

That's when I started thinking what a lazy ass George was.

It wasn't long after that his face and voice popped up on a new TV show I had started watching called 'Ancient Aliens'.  'Ohh noooo', I said, and googled 'George Noory Sucks'.

I continued listening for a few more years, wit low to no expectations and more for the humor of the suckage than anything else.  I even sent George a few constructive criticism emails.  I was pretty surprised at the emails I got back from him - just a few words or a sentence calling me a 'low life' or 'pond scum'.  He made it pretty clear he isn't interested in improving.

I have to admit it was fun listening to those shows, laughing at George, posting with the people on the GLP George Suck thread, then here.  Then at some point it wasn't worth listening to anymore, even for the humorous hideousness of it.


I'm not really pissed off at Art.  I don't 'want' George to suck.  I wish he had turned out to be a fantastic host, or even an acceptable one.  But he didn't, and isn't.  And I can't affect any of that anyway.  I just really find George to be quite the character study, and it's fun to follow along with his antics (as long as I don't have to actually listen anymore).


Like I said, if you enjoy him then that's great.  For me, he's terrible.  He's not a good person.  He isn't interested in improving.  He's dumb, lazy and boring.  He Sucks.


Edited to add:  As far as George wanting hints on how to improve - I suggest all he has to do is read this thread, starting from the first page.

Brilliant ..thank you!
Now let's  not forget the dead kids, fake kindness, bogus cures, con men he supports and the other just stupid things he says; SUPER!  THA...THAT'S  RIGHT, COULD IT BE ANGELS?  COULD IT BE A PORTAL?  UNBALEAFABLE!  I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS BUG SUMPTIN ISH GOING ON. I LL ALWAYS TELL YOU THE TRUFF...THATS WHY I AM HERE. AND OF COURSE....OW ERR EWE!  AS WELL HE WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR US ON THOSE SAD LONEY HOLIDAYS...which brings me to the last point...he there nd travels all around etc because he has NO FRIENDS...BECAUSE HE'S  A USED JIZZBAG!!

[aldousburbank]

One Last Note For George

Plus, I'm certain that no matter how much you pay, you will never, ever, be properly laid.  Adios EmEffer! You Suck!

[jazmunda]

One Last Note For George

Plus, I'm certain that no matter how much you pay, you will never, ever, be properly laid.  Adios EmEffer! You Suck!

Please don't go aldous.

[DocHolliday]

I can let Richard C. Hoagland and a lot of those like him slide.  I do take special exception for bringing someone on your show that claims to have served in an armed conflict of the United States without ever having touched the country on a map, let alone claim to have been a USMC Sniper.  Several days late since Veterans Day I suppose but I'm still quite disgusted to have heard someone claim to have "been there done that" when that has never actually happened.

Funny how this slime ball bans (the now dead, finally) Sylvia Browne from his show but yet he tries to pull the same exact sleazy act that she pulled.

George Noory SUCKS

I find it so amusing that I literally typed Snoorge Snoory Sucks into Google and I find this absolute treasure trove of posts with people feeling the exact same way as I do, not to mention providing me with absolute gold like the pizza roll story, which I had missed out on for whatever reason.

I can't put into words how scummy this guy is.  Stop talking with your hands all the time, asshole.

Also anyone thinks he looks a lot like that fat fuck terrorist that we rolled up finally that was behind the 9/11 hijackings?  It's like if Tommy and Snoorgy mated and could produce their livestock offspring, it would look like ol' KSM.



Anyway, enough lurking.  I'm finally registered for the fun.

[DanTSX]

It does seem kinda random to me, I guess that's why I used to be able to listen to him more.  Sometimes he'll seem fairly lucid and on-point, other times strangely detached and off-track from the topic.  Sometimes he seems genuinely interested in paranormal topics, other times he seems to just sleepwalk through it as it's part of the job.  Sometimes he seems empathetic and able to connect emotionally e.g. to callers, other times he's bored and remote and even impolite. 

I can't figure the guy out, it's like he just bounces around alot.  I think he likes being an on-air personality and all that comes with it, but he too often just seems disconnected either from laziness, or boredom, or who-knows-what.  I think he'd be much more suited to something with less responsibility and less preperation like spinning oldies on the solid gold hour or hosting some reality talent show.

It's called BOOZE

[DanTSX]

Please do. I for one would love to read something you've written. Unless its a late nite cook book?   If not please do tell if you don't  want it to be public knowledge please send me a pm. I don't think you ever named it before ? I will keep it to myself if you prefer. Who knows...imagine if you are a sci fi author that I already read and love, boy would I feel bad for busting your shoes and giving u a hard time eh?!

He wrote these fine literary examples:

MV Let me know if this is some sort of copyright violation, y'know.  Like streaming proprietary SXM radio content.

http://www.amazon.com/Fucked-Lake-Monster-Trilogy-ebook/dp/B008657Y3W/ref=pd_sbs_sg_38

Cassie had heard the legends about Champy, the monster rumored to live in the waters of Lake Champlain, but she never thought they were true. Cassie is about to discover he does exist and have a night she will never forget.

Monster sexual acts ensue!

Not appropriate for readers under 18.

This 4,300 word story contains dinosaur on co-ed sexual acts, oral sex, masturbation, a giant cock and lots of cum.

http://www.amazon.com/Fucking-Bigfoot-Monster-Erotica-ebook/dp/B008V0K3XA/ref=pd_sim_kstore_94
Mindy and her 2 female roommates head out for a weekend camping trip in the woods.

Shortly after they arrive, Mindy is abducted by a Bigfoot!

What are the Bigfoot's plans, and will Mindy escape unharmed?


Excerpt:

As I got further from the campsite, I tripped over a tree root and fell. What should have been a short fall led to a long, rolling fall straight down into a ravine. I tried grabbing onto various vines and vegetation, anything to slow or stop my descent, by I kept rolling down. I rolled for a good 20 seconds and then I must have passed out. I remember my vision blurring, and I was unable to stand. The last thing I saw was the sky growing dark, and feeling the wet mud beneath me as I lay on my back.

I awoke with a strange feeling. I momentarily forgot where I was when I realized it was extremely cold, and it was night. It was pitch black, and I could barely see my hand in front of my face. How was I going to get out of this mess? I didn't even know which way to go to get back to my camp. I assumed the others must be looking for me. There was no way they would ever think to look in the bottom of this ravine. Even if they did, they would never be able to see me in the blackness.

As I looked around, pondering my first move, I realized I was not alone. A dark form was sitting a few feet away, and it spoke. “Ahh, female you are awake. You are far from home female.”

I screamed at the sound of the unfamiliar voice. It sounded like the voice of a someone big; a deep booming gravelly voice. It made the hair on my back stand up when I heard it. I couldn't help but scream.

“You scream female, and yet I have done nothing yet to cause this.” The dark form leapt forward, and scooped me up so quickly, throwing me over its shoulder. I screamed again. This was no human. This was a Bigfoot.

I was high in the air, at least nine feet up, kicking and screaming as the Bigfoot crashed through the forest, carrying me further and further away from where I landed.

“Put me down,” I said bravely. It smelled so bad, like roadkill, “I am not to be toyed with mister!”

“Haw Ho Ho” It chuckled softly. “Be quiet female I have done you no harm as of yet. I will soon if you struggle.”

I had been beating the Bigfoot in his back this entire time, but when he said that I stopped. It was no use, the beast was so big, my fists and feet had no effect. As he crashed through the forest, I could tell we were covering a lot of ground quickly. The forest seemed to close in on us, but this did not slow him down. He crashed loudly through the thick underbrush for quite a long time.

Thoughts ran through my mind. What would this beast do to me. Was I to be some sort of meal for him once we made it far enough into the forest? I shuddered at the thought of this happening; I didn't want to go out like this. I had my whole life ahead of me. I decided if given the chance I would do my best to find a way out of this. I would not resign myself to my fate.

Length: 3500 words of Bigfoot abduction, oral sex, bareback sex, mind blowing orgasms, Monster cock, and an explosion of Bigfoot cum.

[DanTSX]

Not to my memory. He was much welcomed after Siegal and did a fine job replacing him before declining. He was fine as the The Nighthawk here in St. Louis and had a dedicated fan base as a local broadcaster, one that he built very rapidly.

I'll tell you hard it is to write a book with someone else's help. It's about 50 percent as intensive as writing it yourself, especially for a book like Worker in the Light. To write something biographical for someone would require a huge synopsis of their life that only they can provide, constant contact, and a huge amount of hours on the part of the subject. Even if it's entirely a fabrication to make them look good, it takes even more time. You still have to make it satisfactory to them, which requires revision after revision, submission after submission, until you finally get it right. Well, I write books for a living and it takes me about 6 hours per day for about six months to write an 80,000 word novel. Halve that and you still have significant time invested. Don't believe me? I'll write four paragraphs for you about your life in a PM. Wait until you see what I have to ask just to compose four paragraphs and what you have to do to provide it. Challenge open.

Try a convention. A few hours of Q and A and travel equates in reality to many hours. Fly from LA to Toronto and tell me how long that takes. Then travel to and from the airport. Then the event itself. And then back home. Tell me what condition you're in after that. Then we can talk about how easy it is. What it really is an entirely blown day just for a few hours of public contact.

I have no idea what it takes to tape a TV show. It's probably longer than the air time.

Agents, LOL. Um, no. Agents tell you what to do and remind you that you do not pay them directly, instead they take a percentage of the haul. They are a vested party, not a service. I get a daily contact from one and it's never something about them doing something meaningful for me, rather it's a nicely-worded "to do" list. As far as management, I have no idea if Noory's on that level or not. I would suspect Tommy does it, but I really don't know and I have no idea how much effort or what goes on there.

Now a cook book, that's low-intensity, but I doubt it was George's idea. That's a publisher using George's name to make money. It's telling by how little George is promoting it on air.

He asked you for tips in this thread on how to improve and said multiple times that he's willing to listen to constructive criticism. He showed that he was reactive on air. It was well discussed. You were here. I was here. There was much talk at that time just a few months ago about George doing things on air related to this board. I personally got him to ask a question on air simply by not being a flagrant asshole to him when I suggested it. How the fuck much did you need to indicate to you that the guy was listening and reacting?

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. It's a different thing to observe, satirize and heckle that someone sucks, and to WANT someone to suck. If you WANT George to Suck, then you're really pissed off at Art. You, Paper, WANT George to suck. It's misguided.

yeah, the back of the book even said exactly that.  the publisher was promoting his uh....skills and using snoors as an example.

[bateman]

He wrote these fine literary examples:

MV Let me know if this is some sort of copyright violation, y'know.  Like streaming proprietary SXM radio content.

http://www.amazon.com/Fucked-Lake-Monster-Trilogy-ebook/dp/B008657Y3W/ref=pd_sbs_sg_38



http://www.amazon.com/Fucking-Bigfoot-Monster-Erotica-ebook/dp/B008V0K3XA/ref=pd_sim_kstore_94
Mindy and her 2 female roommates head out for a weekend camping trip in the woods.

Hahahahahahahahaha, wow.

[DanTSX]

Here is some fine literature with off-world alien content.  George should interview the author...  I bet that Hoagie has a fine collection of this type of stuff.

BISEXUAL ALIEN GROUP SEX DEMONSEED ABDUCTION THROUGH A PORTHOLE.  WATCH HER HOT POCKET GET STUFFED BY TWO ALIEN DEMON PROBES AT ONCE!

[/size][/glow]

http://www.amazon.com/Claimed-Aliens-Publishing-LoveXtreme-Forever-ebook/dp/B00G2LWDA6/ref=pd_sim_kstore_56
Claimed by Aliens [Claimed 1] (Siren Publishing LoveXtreme Forever) [Kindle Edition]

[Siren LoveXtreme Forever: Erotic Sci-Fi Menage Romance, M/M/M/M/M/F, with M/M elements, HEA] A naughty impulse leads to an extraordinary night... Chloe has always loved her best friend, Kyle, so when he and his boyfriend, Rick, invite her into their bed she can't resist. Rick is an alien seeking suitable partners to complete his Jernodrian family pod. He always wanted Chloe, as well as Kyle, so when she comes to their bed willingly, proving everything he and Kyle believed about her, Rick impulsively claims her, marking her a Jernodrian del-shera. Now not only does he have to explain to Chloe how her life has been changed forever, he has to introduce her to his other three husbands. Will Chloe accept that she's now a part of a six-way Jernodrian marriage, or will Rick's impulsive action tear his newly completed family apart? It certainly doesn't help when heavily armed men claiming to be from the immigration department get involved... Note: This book contains double anal penetration. ** A Siren Erotic Romance

[DanTSX]

Oh shit, sorry guys.  My granddaughter is reading this. 

I had to edit out the words.  "Primordial Alien Life Jizm" and replace them with "primordial Alien Life soup".

George do you like soup?

[DanTSX]

Ghostse.cx....
Whitney (Paranormal BBW Shape Shifter Romance) (Alpha Marked) [Kindle Edition]http://www.amazon.com/Whitney-Paranormal-Shifter-Romance-Marked-ebook/dp/B00G8OGIEO/ref=pd_sim_kstore_10

[PB the Deplorable]

These are hilarious.  Shouldn't that be 'Whitley' instead of 'Whitney'?

[DanTSX]

These are hilarious.  Shouldn't that be 'Whitley' instead of 'Whitney'?

Thats how I read it.

and I felt my bunghole tense up.  and not in a good way



Oh look!  More Ghostporn.cx! 

ECTOJISM!

http://www.amazon.com/Ectojism-Rough-Breeding-Erotica-ebook/dp/B00ATFIWJW/ref=pd_sim_kstore_83

Tired of her city life, Wilma snaps up a bargain price house in the country and leaves for a vacation. However, she soon discovers that the house is haunted by a ghost, and he takes out all his rage and desires on her!

This 7,600 word story contains ectoplasm soaked blowjobs, ghostly fisting, rough double penetration on the ceiling, and a woman getting filled with gallons of ectojism!

Excerpt:

An inhuman laugh echoed through the room, and a force pressed down at the foot of the bed, pressing two indentations where knees would be.

Holy ****. He was here with me.

“God, please don’t hurt me!” I said through my gasps, backing up to the headboard.

Another laugh echoed through the room, and I backed myself up harder. Dead end. Holy ****, I had to ******* run. Ghosts did exist, and this one was going to do something horrible to me!

I turned to run, but the sheet ripped out from underneath me in a flash, and floated in the air, only to come flying towards me. It tore itself into four pieces and they wrapped themselves around my wrists and then my ankles, round and round, until they tied themselves to all four posts of the four poster bed. They stretched my body like a rack would, and I screamed. It splayed more and more of my body out, widening my legs and arms, leaving me defenceless.

“Stop, stop, please!” I screamed, straining my body. If these pulled anymore, my arms and legs would both go flying right across the room. “What do you want?”

Another laugh echoed out, and I froze. He came towards me. His icy presence towered over me, and I shook.

“SEX!” a voice boomed.

[zeebo]

Tonite ... Bigfoot research & LMH.  I should be happy - I thought LMH was pretty wild when she was on Dark Matter and I just can't get enough of dem bigfeets.  However, all I can think of is that ol' muttonhead Noory and how he's gonna bore it up.  What a waste.  The good thing however is that often he just goes silent (i.e. checks his emails etc.) while Linda rocks out her recorded interviews, so there is some hope for decent content.

[Jocko Johnson]

First off, on any of my performance reviews that showed 5 significant issues that impacted my performance for more than 6 months, I would be let go. And so would most people. If my superior let those issues continue for any time past that, their position would be in question. For it to go 10 years...

Noory is a hack, and he sucks.

I also find it interesting that you suggest PB sees things as he wants to. Are you able to put that label on yourself as well?

Thank you...man the fishy just don't get it...or he isn't  the fishy at all but a so called hawk but not likely  as this guy can actually  write a complete  sentence most likely one of his flock.

[DanTSX]

Tonite ... Bigfoot research & LMH.  I should be happy - I thought LMH was pretty wild when she was on Dark Matter and I just can't get enough of dem bigfeets.  However, all I can think of is that ol' muttonhead Noory and how he's gonna bore it up.  What a waste.  The good thing however is that often he just goes silent (i.e. checks his emails etc.) while Linda rocks out her recorded interviews, so there is some hope for decent content.

He can always check in here for bell gab book club recommendations

[Jocko Johnson]

I can let Richard C. Hoagland and a lot of those like him slide.  I do take special exception for bringing someone on your show that claims to have served in an armed conflict of the United States without ever having touched the country on a map, let alone claim to have been a USMC Sniper.  Several days late since Veterans Day I suppose but I'm still quite disgusted to have heard someone claim to have "been there done that" when that has never actually happened.

Funny how this slime ball bans (the now dead, finally) Sylvia Browne from his show but yet he tries to pull the same exact sleazy act that she pulled.

George Noory SUCKS

I find it so amusing that I literally typed Snoorge Snoory Sucks into Google and I find this absolute treasure trove of posts with people feeling the exact same way as I do, not to mention providing me with absolute gold like the pizza roll story, which I had missed out on for whatever reason.

I can't put into words how scummy this guy is.  Stop talking with your hands all the time, asshole.

Also anyone thinks he looks a lot like that fat fuck terrorist that we rolled up finally that was behind the 9/11 hijackings?  It's like if Tommy and Snoorgy mated and could produce their livestock offspring, it would look like ol' KSM.



Anyway, enough lurking.  I'm finally registered for the fun.

Welcome and spot on assessment  of the suckage that is the snoorgey!

I would love to know how much that scumbag Brinkley really makes from his charity and what the charity gets. If anyone knows the charity's name and state of registration it may be listed. I bet it's  like 97% to 3% or something  like that. He's a complete fraud. They banged him out in a book called stolen valor. He then claimed he was deep cover CIA and his records were...well you know...shhhhh don't  say nothing it's a secret!

[LAM4:2]

I've heard of Freeartbell in other threads, but i can honestly say I'm nooryfree.

[zeebo]

He can always check in here for bell gab book club recommendations

Why, he already reads plenty:

* Readers Digest "Laughter's the Best Medicine" joke section
* Family Circus comic each Sunday
* Parade magazine "Personality Parade" section
* 7-11 sandwich coupon flyer
* Elvis Impersonator Monthly

[Falkie2013]

IT is on the air.

The Boremaster walks among us !!! ...

" Could this be the comet of prophecy ? "

" Blue moons, blue comets. Who KNOWS what's going on out there ? "


" Blue moon ... you saw me sucking alone. ... "

What in the hell do red light cameras have to do with the paranormal ?

" Is it going to hold water ? What do you think ? "

Is that the water between $noory's ears ?

[Textor]

Hm, I think we need to have a celebration when this thread reaches page 1337. We officially will have become "leet" in our opposition to Noory.

[jazmunda]

IT is on the air.

The Boremaster walks among us !!! ...

" Could this be the comet of prophecy ? "

" Blue moons, blue comets. Who KNOWS what's going on out there ? "


" Blue moon ... you saw me sucking alone. ... "

What in the hell do red light cameras have to do with the paranormal ?

" Is it going to hold water ? What do you think ? "

Is that the water between $noory's ears ?

I'm betting George plays this tonight:

http://youtu.be/h9JArvEJ64M

[zeebo]

Bigfoot buttprints?

[Falkie2013]

Why, he already reads plenty:

* Readers Digest "Laughter's the Best Medicine" joke section
* Family Circus comic each Sunday
* Parade magazine "Personality Parade" section
* 7-11 sandwich coupon flyer
* Elvis Impersonator Monthly

* Broadcasting for Dummies
* Charisma for Dummies
* Bigfoot for Dummies
* The Mustasche Dating Club.
* Comets for Dummies
* 1,001 Bee Recipes
* Asteroids for Dummies
* Decorating with Turmeric
* Emergency Manual for Extracting Feet in Mouth
* Bigfeet I have known.
* Duets With Bigfoot
* Elvis Fakebook for Dummies

and for Tommy :

* Sidekicks for Dummies
* Voodoo doll tips for sidekicks
* First Aid for Pizza Roll Users
* 1000 Ways to Kill and Replace Your Talk Show Host Boss
* Cabinet on wall of studio that says :


    In case of on air coughing attack break glass with hammer.

    Oxygen tank in cabinet.

* Roget's Nooryism Interpreter for Ipad.

[Falkie2013]

Oh shit, sorry guys.  My granddaughter is reading this. 

I had to edit out the words.  "Primordial Alien Life Jizm" and replace them with "primordial Alien Life soup".

George do you like soup?

* Dummies book : Cooking with Jism.

On both $noorge's and the female troll's bookshelf.

They'll be meeting soon to compare notes.

[zeebo]

* Broadcasting for Dummies
* Charisma for Dummies
* Bigfoot for Dummies
* The Mustasche Dating Club.
* Comets for Dummies
* 1,001 Bee Recipes
* Asteroids for Dummies
* Decorating with Turmeric
* Emergency Manual for Extracting Feet in Mouth
* Bigfeet I have known.
* Duets With Bigfoot
* Elvis Fakebook for Dummies
...

* Mustache Grooming for Dummies
* Boring People for Fun and for Profit
* How to Lose Friends and Alienate People
* Top 50 Obsolete Golden Oldie Ballads
* Gilligan's Island Complete Reference Book
* 1001 Uninteresting Coincidences

[DanTSX]

* Dummies book : Cooking with Jism.

On both $noorge's and the female troll's bookshelf.

They'll be meeting soon to compare notes.

They got that too
http://www.amazon.com/Natural-Harvest-collection-semen-based-recipes/dp/1481227041

Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be

[Falkie2013]

TMI on jism.

I'm waiting for the forest denizens to get a crank radio & turn on $noory and watch all the forest animals descend on LA and proceed to throw things at $noory's studio as they go berserk and destroy the station after listening to the first hour.