Art Bell

[anagrammy]

Aguagoat, you make some valid points here, and I'd like to comment.  First off, Art formed a unique bond with his audience without pandering to guests. Most of us listened to him every night--that's more time than I spent with my boyfriend.  He shared his struggles openly, keeping very little private but without ego.  When he interviewed people, he asked the next logical question that was in my own mind. He became everyman/every woman.  Never, EVER did I sit up in bed and say "What?  NOOOOO!  Tell me you are NOT going to let that go by---!!!  When you become that kind of celebrity, a Johnny Carson, you give up the right to privacy because everyone thinks they know you.  You can't just fade away after creating the monster audience that Art had.  And of course we are going to speculate because all we have now is each other.  We're like people talking softly in the lobby after the funeral, then suggesting to stop off on the way home and have a few drinks.  I don't know about you, but I've suffered withdrawal and experienced a kind of loss, even with a few tears when I hear certain music.  Art disappeared and the investigation is under way... and, with this audience, OF COURSE there's a conspiracy afoot!  Love us a good conspiracy...we even have a stonewalling "cop" and a villain! LOL

When Art went to Manila, remember all the technical trouble he had?  OMG, it was one thing after another, including monsoons, earthquakes, floods, etc.  Art in the hands of an angry god!  It was clearly much harder than he imagined and he bounced back to Nevada.  It doesn't take much imagination to picture the marital discussions around that alone.  And did Art talk about that?  Nooo, with a cat-swallowed-the-canary voice he comes on "from the Kingdom of Nye" and a national gasp went up into space. 

Now he has a new Philippine mother away from her female relatives and an old man with sleep deprivation to help out.  Even with hired help, she cries all day.  And here comes the immigration service.  Art's gotta be beaten down--back to Manila he goes and every solution he's tried so far just hasn't worked out.  And Premiere/Clear Channel is on his ass, too! 

     "We've spent $$$, Art, and we're just not seeing a return here, you promised things would settle down...blah, blah, blah, and you haven't kept your commitment to the fifteen shows.  That's a contract violation and our lawyers---

     "Lawyers?" yells Art, "Fuck your lawyers, you do NOT speak to me in that tone---I created this show and look what you've done with it--"  The suits sit back, "Mr. Bell, the PR people have concerns that certain negative influences may be causing the affiliates to drop.  These unscreened callers--"

     "Unscreened callers?  You think THAT'S the problem?  I'll tell you the problem, Mr. Jackwagon, you've got an ass-licking host with a dullknife IQ and a fixation on angels handling high-powered guests with Ph.D's and he cannot ask them the simplest question without fucking up the pronunciation!  He can't even pronounce the CITIES in California correctly!  George Noory is a fool's tool and the audience is RESPONDING!  The callers are idiots because the audience has eroded to a gaggle of middle-aged abused women who want to hear a "nice" man in their bed at night!  NO EDGE, that's why the sponsors are leaving-- you've lost the EDGE!"

     Suits are looking at each other.  "You may be right, but we must insist that you have screened callers for the Halloween show.  The PR consultant has correlated affiliate drop-offs with critical callers and we just can't take any more hits like last ----.  We know you think it adds to the energy, is more reality-based and all that, but you can't argue with numbers.  Sorry, Mr. Bell."

     Art flies home and says to Areyn, "I've had it with those dickheads.  They are going down, baby, and I can't stop it, but I am sure as hell not going to be part of it.  It's the end of Coast to Coast, that's all, fini."

     I do not think Art is in a bad place mentally--he gave everything his best shot, he's just on to a new phase of life.  It takes time to recover from corporate abuse (AS WE ALL KNOW).  If Art's physical health is good, and we all know the hell he's gone through with his back (remember that's what got him thinking of retiring even before Ramona died), so if he has surgery, or PT, or resolves the chronic pain, I would expect to hear something again from Art (along with Steiber or ?) once his daughter starts school.  If Areyn is pregnant again, all bets are off on that.

     Hope you enjoyed my little fiction at the virtual bar here, pour me another White Russian, MV,  and slide me over some of those peanuts... I like the speculating.


Anagrammy

PS.  Why did MV change his handle...what's the REAL reason?  Does anybody have the inside scoop?

[Agent : Orange]

I don't really understand the speculation about screened calls. I heard a show on MVs stream from 2006 where Art talked about using screeners because of the time difference between America and the Phillipenes.

I'd put my money on the problem being bureaucratic red tape bullshit.

[FortRock]

Great spirit Somewhere Out There! Yes Art has a brand new gig out there, and George knows it. Have you noted his attitute change over the last couple of weeks?

[minnehan]

    ...Art flies home and says to Areyn, "I've had it with those dickheads.  They are going down, baby, and I can't stop it, but I am sure as hell not going to be part of it.  It's the end of Coast to Coast, that's all, fini."

    I'd hate to be Mr. Jackwagon with Anagrammy writing Art's material like that!  This is great, very logical speculation... thanks Anagrammy for the excellent posts!  My hopes are higher than ever that Art WILL return!

[Diabhal]

Hi guys. Miss the Art shows. Does anybody have a demonoid invite code?

Thanks.

[MV/Liberace!]

Does anybody have a demonoid invite code?

Thanks.

didn't i already send u one?

[MV/Liberace!]

Hi guys. Miss the Art shows. Does anybody have a demonoid invite code?

Thanks.

didn't i already send u one?

actually, i guess i didn't.  check your PM.

[heater]

@anagrammy I think you have uncovered the real hidden gem in your last post

PS.  Why did MV change his handle...what's the REAL reason?  Does anybody have the inside scoop?

I wonder if Clear Channel or Premier have a deal with Michael to host a show?  Maybe he is going to sign with G. Beck?!?!  all I know is I saw this mysterious posting on his webcam:

[guildnavigator]

this thread is a journey.

don't stop believin'

[James G.]

The best line I've heard the great Mr. Art Bell ever say on-air:

"West of the Rockies, you're on the air...[dead air] Hello?[more dead air] ...Going once...Going twice...Gone! International line, you're on the air..."

[Queen]

i finally got an email response from art.  it is as follows:


Michael,
Thanks for your interest in my status with Coast to Coast AM.  Before I divulge any information, I'd like to ask that you acquire and send me nude pictures of any hot women living in your building.  No fatties.

Sincerely,
Art Bell
W6OBB

so, there you have it, everyone.  art's coming back!!!  yeaaaahhh!!!


<<high five>>

Why does he want naked woman pictures is he leaving airyn?

[HAL 9000]

Why does he want naked woman pictures...

If you have to ask, I don't think you'd understand the answer...

[Agent : Orange]

Well, I lol'd.

[ArtBellFan]

Great spirit Somewhere Out There! Yes Art has a brand new gig out there, and George knows it. Have you noted his attitude change over the last couple of weeks?

Since I don't listen and haven't heard his attitude it may be that he is afraid without Art doing shows any longer not wanting to associate with Coast the show will really go down now that Art isn't around to keep up the ratings.  Speaking of ratings, what ratings they do have would like to know how much of those ratings are attributed to the weekend shows and the bundling, nothing is ever as it seems.

[DoYouThinkItWasAngels]

anagrammy, I love your writing!  You have a great way of breathing life into these situations.

[aquagoat]

There  have been some references to ratings dropping,  and to the number of affiliate stations being on the wane.  Does anyone have - or know where to source - this sort of data?  It's all well and good that we all  huddle here to this thread, rubbing are hands in conspiratorial glee when speaking of GN about to see the End of Days, only not quite the ones he has so fervently preached of, and about how Armaggedaon is about to descend on him and Premiere too, like a swarm of electronic locusts, sent by the contracted firings of HAARP, aimed by some Illuminati banker working for a New World Order Neilson Radio Ratings Book. . . . .

. . . . errr - sorry, been upping my meds without proper authority again . . . .  got to ramblin' just a tad.

Can anyone speak in an informed voice regarding radio ratings and the size of the Premiere overnight network?  Rather than listening to selective markets for hints and whispers,  it might better serve us to monitor any changes in the Premeire network overnight numbers, and watch for changes in the network size.

Just curious . . .

[anagrammy]

anagrammy, I love your writing!  You have a great way of breathing life into these situations.

Thanks much.  I think it would all make a marvelous novel, full of twists and unexpected turns.  As they say, you can't make this stuff up!  But you can definitely play around with it because all things are personal.  The loss of Art Bell is personal to me and millions of other listeners and former listeners.  We are adjusting, but it's tough. 

We find comaraderie and other smart alecks here who appreciated Art, knew what Art's Parts meant and can finish the sentence, "Sometimes a cigar..."    We are not alone:  as a group we know disclosure isn't coming, Hoagland has no clue and Linda Moulton Howe will die on a pile of evidence without ever having reached a conclusion.  That having been said, they were GREAT FUN to listen to when Art was at the mic because he would take that Occam's razor and whip their butts with it.

That's not going to happen with Noory--but it can happen here!

Anagrammy

[anagrammy]

WARNING:  SPECULATION ALERT

Just wondering if the plea on the Coast website to send in our fantastic stories for a possible TV program might be ...wait for it...an AB PROJECT coalescing in a galaxy near us?

Please find out who's behind this.  I don't give my fantastic stories to just anyone. 


Anagrammy

[minnehan]

WARNING:  SPECULATION ALERT

Just wondering if the plea on the Coast website to send in our fantastic stories for a possible TV program might be ...wait for it...an AB PROJECT coalescing in a galaxy near us?

Please find out who's behind this.  I don't give my fantastic stories to just anyone. 


Anagrammy

   Norry a few nights ago mentioned this "appeal" of wild, farout stories was on behalf of long time C2C listener Henry "The Fronz" Winkler who wants to make a tv series (or movie?)  around the idea.

   Like you said, you can't make this stuff up.

[HAL 9000]

too much of a good thing(s)

You know, there are many famous variants of your observation which I won't elaborate much on specifically (more than a handful, etc.) - but allow me to say that, within what I'd consider to be perhaps a "universal" agreement on what is "too much," (unhealthy, deformity etc.), the notion of "too much" is not part of my vocabulary.

Just to be clear, I am a lover of women of all shapes and sizes; again, within reasonable limits; but excessive "curviness" of the upper torso simply does not exist for me.

Now, back to the drama....

[b_dubb]

that woman's funbags must play hell on her spine.  that's all i'm saying.  and would shatter my hands like a fine crystal place setting under a sledgehammer.  maybe i need to do hand exercises. maybe i need some breast related martial arts training.  i don't know.

you're a braver man than i

[James G.]

WARNING:  SPECULATION ALERT

Just wondering if the plea on the Coast website to send in our fantastic stories for a possible TV program might be ...wait for it...an AB PROJECT coalescing in a galaxy near us?

Please find out who's behind this.  I don't give my fantastic stories to just anyone. 


Anagrammy

Exactly, Anagrammy. Note that the submissions text lists nothing about what happens to your intellectual property before you turn it over to Premiere Radio Networks, Mr. Henry Winkler...or whoever is lurking out there.

I agree. I write and create big things. I will, in no way, turn anything over to some network that implies "Trust Us."

And note that they request YOUR contact info. Not theirs. The classic case of "Don't call us, we'll call you."

If I had a dollar for every one in the entertainment business who told me that, I'd have a lot of money to assist others.

Darn good point, Anagrammy! Darn good. We just don't just turn over our heart-and-soul to anyone BEFORE we know who they are -- and what we're getting into.

And listen to to some of those "guests" the program has. Would you trust them as far as you could throw them? Come on, now.

Some people have never lived. But they seek to take from those who have, to do nothing but pad their egos.

There's a lot of fakes and phonies out there. Often posing as "award-winning" authors, performers or portrayers.

What a bunch of jerks. Jerks.

Enough said. Chalk one up for people of the real world.

[James G.]

that woman's funbags must play hell on her spine.  that's all i'm saying.  and would shatter my hands like a fine crystal place setting under a sledgehammer.  maybe i need to do hand exercises. maybe i need some breast related martial arts training.  i don't know.

you're a braver man than i

Good point. I've known young women so "endowed." And yes, some of them had back problems because of their top-heaviness.

And there were those who reached age 40. Then the supposed fun bags become the proverbial sag bags. And when so many young women get breast enlargements, these women get breast cosmetic-surgery-- I believe I remember them calling it a "reduction and lift."

Good point.

[HAL 9000]

...and would shatter my hands like a fine crystal place setting under a sledgehammer.  maybe i need to do hand exercises.

Let's agree to mixed metaphors - you refer to fine crystal and sledgehammers, while I'd more liken my face with soft pillows.

Insofar as your hand exercises are concerned, I would refer you to BadBoy of the NutHawkZone  - who apparently is an expert at hand/wrist exercises of multiple variation.

The mature woman in the tiny video is actually an intellectual who is apparently quite a bookworm. I love smart women.

I promise I'm trying to stay on topic. I blame it all on MV.

[Queen]

apparently no one got the sarcasm  : oh well

[HAL 9000]

apparently no one got the sarcasm  : oh well

I'll admit the sarcasm was lost on me - I'm sure as a result of some of the nutty posts in this thread - NOW I know to be more discerning with you... I took your post literally. Sorry

[Fly By Night]

So this thread is amazing and has taken a great many twists and turns. Many of us are having fun with this disturbing subject. At the same time many people are taking Art's silence personally. Art I really have no doubt that you are reading these posts while petting a cat and throwing darts at a picture of Noory. Art- as others as well as myself have noted you certainly enjoy having a fog of mystery around you. But as you can read there are theories about you floating around that would make Richard C Hoagland laugh. I don't expect you to tell us whether you are going to return to radio, or post a copy of any contracts you may have signed until you are ready. With that said it would be nice to have you drop in and tell us that all the AB's are fine. If not I'm just going to assume that the feds finally arrested you for having those damn Art's parts.

The good news is a simple check with NYE County's public online tax records shows that Art bell is still owns his property in Nevada. He seems to be keeping his options open

[ArtBellFan]

The only forum Art posts on is Fantastic Forum and the last time was 12-22-09 and here is his post:

I love it here! The Volcano is 300 miles South of Manila. It is really cool, I am tempted to drive down there with my High Defination camera and see if I can get some good shots.

I know it is hard for some of you to understand why we like it here so much. It is hard to explain but we do. There are many benefits that I just do not have time to explain in this post.

Art

It looks like we are not going to hear from Art, if we were I think he would have posted by now.

[HAL 9000]

So this thread is amazing and has taken a great many twists and turns. Many of us are having fun with this disturbing subject. At the same time many people are taking Art's silence personally. Art I really have no doubt that you are reading these posts while petting a cat and throwing darts at a picture of Noory... <snipped for brevity>

A brilliant and ARTfully amusing analysis my friend.

[fabucat]

Why does he want naked woman pictures is he leaving airyn?

I call it a fraud.  Anyone and everyone knows that millions of gorgeous women send Art Bell their pictures every day via the internets.  If you were female and a babe, admit it, wouldn't you?  Either that or Art has a really wild sense of humor.