George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[ItsOver]

Even at a "measly" $500k, you'd think Premrat could dig up somebody better than Noory.  Jorch must be the king of corporate ass kissers.  At least he's good at something, unfortunately.

[NoMoreNoory]

Well, at least he's really good at computers.  I just discovered this yesterday and had to listen to it three times:


  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNsMW4n3z9Y

Eddie Dean! Magnificent. How we at NMN miss Word Of The Day.

[HorrorRetro]

Well, at least he's really good at computers.  I just discovered this yesterday and had to listen to it three times:


  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNsMW4n3z9Y

Where in the hell has this been? This is the first time I've heard it. Both my husband and I were laughing until we were crying. 

[nextgen.fm]

advances in science for a couple hours with george!!!

[NoMoreNoory]

Really? Seriously? Honestly? With people still in the depths of grief, Joorch and Peter Davenport speculating that the AirAsia plane was captured by aliens?

[Major Ed Damien]

Where in the hell has this been? This is the first time I've heard it. Both my husband and I were laughing until we were crying. 

It just disappeared.  Like that plane from Indonesia.  Or the other one from Malaysia.

Maybe aliens were hiding the video AND the airplanes. 

George taught me how to think like that.

[nextgen.fm]

Really? Seriously? Honestly? With people still in the depths of grief, Joorch and Peter Davenport speculating that the AirAsia plane was captured by aliens?

i really hope not


cnn just breaking that they are finding wreckage

[Major Ed Damien]

i really hope not


cnn just breaking that they are finding wreckage

But aliens could have caused the wreckage with their death ray.

George knows that there is more to this story than sadness and tragedy.

[nextgen.fm]

But aliens could have caused the wreckage with their death ray.

George knows that there is more to this than sadness and tragedy.

does gorg have CNN on in his studio or Nick at Nite?

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

does gorg have CNN on in his studio or Nick at Nite?

Fox.

[Major Ed Damien]

does gorg have CNN on in his studio or Nick at Nite?

I think George usually has the Toupee Shopping Network on or else TV Land.

[Jorch Einstein]

Jorch released a book last year, with William "UFO Hunters" Birnes called Late-Night Snacks: Winning Recipes for Late-Night Radio Listening.
WTF? I don't see a recipe for Burn Your Throat Like An Idiot Pizza Rolls, but there are recipes for Dumplings Love You (must be inspired by Tommy), and Rum Coffee for Your Nerves (Jorch must swallow gallons of it before he hits the air).
From Jorch's copy on the book: The world is a scary place, and it’s hard to know who to trust. However, you can trust these recipes. Trust me on that.
Yeah right. What's the next book Jorch will be writing/having his name put on after it's ghostwritten?
Jorch Noory's Guide to Keeping Your High-Paying Job Even Though You're an Incompetent Buffoon?
Jorch Noory's Guide to Satisfying Your Partner In Bed (with anecdotes from his amorous adventures with Tommy)?
Jorch Noory's Guide To Portals and Angels?
Jorch Noory's Guide to Understanding That There Are No Coincidences
Jorch Noory's Guide to Sanskrit (It's called Sanskrit because it was written in sand)?
Jorch Noory's Guide to Plato (Better Than Clay, Make Fun Shapes With It, But Don't Eat It, It Tastes Bad)?

[nextgen.fm]

Jorch released a book last year, with William "UFO Hunters" Birnes called Late-Night Snacks: Winning Recipes for Late-Night Radio Listening.
WTF? I don't see a recipe for Burn Your Throat Like An Idiot Pizza Rolls, but there are recipes for Dumplings Love You (must be inspired by Tommy), and Rum Coffee for Your Nerves (Jorch must swallow gallons of it before he hits the air).
From Jorch's copy on the book: The world is a scary place, and it’s hard to know who to trust. However, you can trust these recipes. Trust me on that.
Yeah right. What's the next book Jorch will be writing/having his name put on after it's ghostwritten?
Jorch Noory's Guide to Keeping Your High-Paying Job Even Though You're an Incompetent Buffoon?
Jorch Noory's Guide to Satisfying Your Partner In Bed (with anecdotes from his amorous adventures with Tommy)?
Jorch Noory's Guide To Portals and Angels?
Jorch Noory's Guide to Understanding That There Are No Coincidences
Jorch Noory's Guide to Sanskrit (It's called Sanskrit because it was written in sand)?
Jorch Noory's Guide to Plato (Better Than Clay, Make Fun Shapes With It, But Don't Eat It, It Tastes Bad)?

It's true!!!!


http://www.amazon.com/George-Noorys-Late-Night-Snacks-Listening/dp/0765314088

[nextgen.fm]

This guy is blowing George's mind


He's sitting there mouth open HUH

[Major Ed Damien]

George thought it would be very interesting to ask the guest tonight how long he's been interested in space -- the number of years.

George, you bloody fucking idiot.  Even if the man was interested in space as a fucking zygote is it really that fucking fascinating?

Where the fuck is your brain?

   

[Major Ed Damien]

Guest:  "Ah, now you're getting into some interesting stuff."


Yes, you're right.  See, George was just waxing his carrot there for awhile . . .  looking at porn sites again.  He'll be back with you soon, Sir.

[Major Ed Damien]

George:  "What if science was able to turn me into a hologram?  Wouldn't that be exciting?  My wig could look more like hair."

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

These callers are doing the impossible... they are making Noory look good.

[sydtron]

Now this calle is just stating Jordi LaForge from TNG!

[sydtron]

Fuck this! Im turning on U7.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

George's new comedy act to follow his Elvis impersonation:

Hey, hey!  Wasn't technology different when they launched the Mars Rover?  And now it's changed!  Somethin's goin' on!

Hey!  Remember... remember the old time comedians like Red Skelton and Jimmy Durante?  They'd never make it today!  Somethin's goin' on!  The guy in the front row knows what I'm talkin' bout.

Hey!  Remember when we had good broadcasters like Walter Cronkite who knew how to report a story?  Somethin's goin' on!

[zeebo]

Really? Seriously? Honestly? With people still in the depths of grief, Joorch and Peter Davenport speculating that the AirAsia plane was captured by aliens?

After which he fretted about a possible gov't cover-up already in the works.  The segment was awful and the guy needs to stick to glowing orb reports.

[zeebo]

Guest:  "Ah, now you're getting into some interesting stuff."

Problem is, George flits around from flower to flower like a crackhead bee.  The guest mentions advances in nuclear fusion, an important and fascinating topic, and George blurts out "What about asteroids?  Are we gonna get hit?"

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

After which he fretted about a possible gov't cover-up already in the works.  The segment was awful and the guy needs to stick to glowing orb reports.

Welcome back. 

[Rico999]

Haven't listened to the show in several weeks, but it's the same ole George.   Thus, with another commercial jet crashing into the ocean in the Far East, it's GOT to be because of something other than an actual system failure on the aircraft, right?  So let's bring in Peter Davenport for crissakes and get the real lowdown.   That was just plain awful.

Speaking of his salary, even though George is now something like #16 among all radio talkers and is the king of late night, he doesn't have nearly the same numbers as far as listeners nor does he bring in revenue like the more well known and well paid talkers.  When your big advertisers are Carnivora (that's C-A-R-N-I-V-O-R-A, folks!) and you're pitching "emergency meals" that have a 25 year shelf life(!!) from mypatriot.com, you're not exactly bringing in the big bucks.   Don't forget to order the "George Noory Special!"   

I mean, DAMN!

George tells us that the meals "taste great!"  Yeah George?  Try one about 15 years from now and then tell me how tasty it is!

[zeebo]

Welcome back. 

Took some time away, but listening in for the first time in awhile I couldn't let you guys suffer by yourselves.   

[Major Ed Damien]

Took some time away, but listening in for the first time in awhile I couldn't let you guys suffer by yourselves.   

As George Noory might say, "A night without you is a night without sunshine."   

[Major Ed Damien]

Wow.

George just made the announcement of bodies found from the lost airliner.

And he did it in full ghoul mode -- with the creepy voice he uses for Halloween or introductions for segments about ghosts.

There's a classy man under that wig -- back there behind that disco 'stache.

[Immy]

I like Sir Charles' retort to simple Jorch's banal "Getting ready for the New Year?"

Sir Charles: "I don't have much choice."   

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I've always thought these guys who try to relate musical tones to physical structures and DNA etc were fools.  I'm out.  Night.


...unless George actually continues to challenge this guy.