George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Juan]

George was rambling about his charitable foundation - the one that will help listeners pay their light bills - when he said something interesting.  I think he said that he gets a cut of the money paid for streamlink, or whatever they call it now.  He said he will be contributing a portion of his share to the foundation.

Now that's an interesting corporate business model.  You pay the host based on how much he can sell streamlink?

[ziznak]

Not sure if anyone has linked this laugher, but heres Jorch's full premier show

Beyond Belief with George Noory - GMOs with Jeffery M. Smith

Holding the bag of corn chips at the very beginning was great, bet they were really pizza rolls...

WHAAAAAT? a full episode of Beeyaaand BLEEEF???
<grabs plate of pizza rolls and runs to sofa>
I'll be back in about 55 minutes.

[valdez]

Pardon my absence my fellow denizens of the night. Might I say preliminarily that I vehemontly feel that Noory still eats cock and sucks. Secondly, I have missed my heartfelt conversations and opinions with my fellow friends. Thirdly and most importanly...
I came across a newsfeed concerning Art visiting Coastgab and actually taking the time to comment regarding Noory the unrelenting master of cockmasterness. Are these rumours true? Has the great one finally made his presense and feelings known to our loyal band? Or has this been dubbed hoax?
I haven't had time to delve into this myself, any investigation conducted prior with synopsis or links for me to synopsithise would be most apppreciated.

NOORY LOVES THE CAULK

     Welcome back.  Art did indeed register.  MV confirmed and vouched (as best as anyone could) that it was Art.  I believe he even posted something, but I don't recall the thread.

George was rambling about his charitable foundation...of the money paid for streamlink...

     Actually, the money will come from a percentage of the loot they get from subscriptions to the Giaim TV thing.

*   *   *

     Alex Jones on the coming tyranny, and then the amicable James Van Praagh.  He just makes me feel good about dead folks.  Thomas Hackney on asteroids and comets and some odd connection with math and aliens, I think.  Hard to follow someone who's personality puts you to sleep.  George and him never connected, and when George asked him about ufos, and he said he hadn't thought about them since he was 20, "and I'm fifty [something] now," I knew it was over.  George went to open lines, took calls from adoring fans, talked about his upcoming shows, took calls from adoring fans, talked about his upcoming shows, explained why he says "uh huh...uh huh," allowed someone to mention Art's name, and took more calls from adoring fans.
     One more day until the end of the world and my mind wonders who will rule the earth once we are kaput?  Ah, yes, but of course...

the immortal jellyfish

[Yorkshire pud]

          Alex Jones on the coming tyranny,

Can I be there when he's amongst the first against the wall? Please say yes, please, please..

[sleeplessinca]

I loved it when Snoory asked if the guest believed in UFOs, the guest said no and The Snoores mentioned having not done his homework. 
As if.
Heads will roll - or maybe it was a little Christmas gift for us to catch him with his pants down.

[ItsOver]

Noory just mentioned that on his live Christmas Eve show, he will be interviewing Santa Claus in the first hour.
Noory's show has now turned into a kid's show and he is like Captain Kangaroo...

Santa Claus?  What next?  A leprechaun for St. Patrick's?  The Easter Bunny?  Can the show get any worse than it was last night?  Why yes!  Yes it can!  With Jorch at the helm.  Jorch should have interviewed a turkey on Thanksgiving for show tips.

Listening to Jorch's C2C is like an Ed Woods creation without ANY talent.

[Sleepwalker]

Now that's an interesting corporate business model.  You pay the host based on how much he can sell streamlink?

Please join the Coast Insider's Club.  Please?  Please send us 15 cents a day.  Please?  We lost our Chicago radio station and we need that 15 cents a day. Please?  We used to have five million listeners and now the Huffington Post says we only have three million.  And John's water filtration systems and radiation detectors aren't selling that well.  And pizza rolls are getting expensive.  Please send us 15 cents a day.  Please?  Send us 15 cents a day and you can have 24-hour access to a radio show that isn't worth listening to for free.  Please?  Please?  Aw, c'mon, it's only 15 cents a day.  C'mon.  Please?

[Treading Water]

Listening to Jorch's C2C is like an Ed Woods creation without ANY talent.

So......You're saying that sweater is really Tommy's??   

[Juan]

Speaking of Tommy, sNoory told the story last night of Tommy's house.  Tommy purchased said house about 10-years ago, and he has never been in the attic.  He hears noises and voices in the attic, but has never been up there to investigate.

Methinks the voices are in someone's "attic" all right.

[ItsOver]

Maybe Jorch is living in Tommy's attic. 

[Sleepwalker]

Speaking of Tommy, sNoory told the story last night of Tommy's house.  Tommy purchased said house about 10-years ago, and he has never been in the attic.  He hears noises and voices in the attic, but has never been up there to investigate.

Methinks the voices are in someone's "attic" all right.

I does sound as if someone has bats in his belfry.

[Yorkshire pud]

Speaking of Tommy, sNoory told the story last night of Tommy's house.  Tommy purchased said house about 10-years ago, and he has never been in the attic.  He hears noises and voices in the attic, but has never been up there to investigate.

Methinks the voices are in someone's "attic" all right.

I hope Hoagland didn't hear it; he'll be as we type, conducting 'experiments' with his 'crew' to establish if the attic might be the base of a long lost race of Martians who came visiting and made home in Tommy's attic. Leaving behind a small but perfectly formed village of very small Martians. Tickets for the upcoming seminar willbe available just as soon as he's managed to get enough 'origninal NASA' slides photoshopped to give it more ooomph*, and credibility.

*Ooomph is an offical word that is phonetic and used when all other superlatives simply won't do. 

[Morgus]

We learned last night why Noory interrupts guests and callers with "uh-uh" a lot.
He said thats a trick he learned to let the person on the phone know that he is still there and hasn't hung up on them.
Funny how Art Bell never needed that 'trick'

Sounds to me more like an excuse for Noory not really listening to the caller/guest as he is busying surfing the net or something, and just says "uh-uh" a lot to make them think he is listening...

[Morgus]

Jorch should have interviewed a turkey on Thanksgiving for show tips.

well at least there was a 'turkey' hosting the Thanksgiving show... 

[Pragmier]

Not sure if anyone has linked this laugher, but heres Jorch's full premier show

Beyond Belief with George Noory - GMOs with Jeffery M. Smith

Holding the bag of corn chips at the very beginning was great, bet they were really pizza rolls...

George coined a new another word - introducing his guest by saying 'let's welkhim' at the 1 min mark.

[ItsOver]

well at least there was a 'turkey' hosting the Thanksgiving show... 

No doubt.  It sure sounded like a turkey-to-turkey show last night. 

[Morgus]

No doubt.  It sure sounded like a turkey-to-turkey show last night. 

and the same 'turkey' is scheduled to host the live christmas eve and day shows too, unfortunately... 

[popple]

I'm not sure why but my station is playing a repeat show with Ian. It's the show dealing with Jim Sullivan. Ian was in for George in this one, again, I have no idea why the station is airing an repeat. "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part I" had just come out...Ian mentioned this, so that is how far back this repeat is. The second hour guest deals with England and magic. Again. I have no idea why the station is airing a repeat.

Usually my station repeats the show twice, but it did play an Ian show after. Maybe Jorch was so embarrassed by his Sandy Hook incident and every other flop of the night that he refused to let it go to replay. He probably deleted the tape.

He prob went to go binge on some pizza rolls.  EAT ALL YOUR FEELINGS JORCH!!!

[PB the Deplorable]

Not sure if anyone has linked this laugher, but heres Jorch's full premier show

Beyond Belief with George Noory - GMOs with Jeffery M. Smith

Holding the bag of corn chips at the very beginning was great, bet they were really pizza rolls...

Watching some of this, George has the blackest hair of anyone I've ever seen.  Probably the blackest suit I've ever seen as well, love the way the deep colored satin (?) shirts and hankerchefs he wears with it completes the outfit.  Sort of '50s gangster chic.

He's so animated - when he walks down the aisle, nodding, shaking hands, whispering into people ear, he gets up there sort of jerking about, oddly moving his head around and waving his hands, talking the whole time, all that black, it's like he's not real, some kind of puppet or something.

I wonder what he's whispering in people ears as he heads up the aisle to the 'stage'.  He probably has seen other hosts do that and thus thinks he should do it too, going thru the motions, whispering nothing or maybe a 'glad tuh see yuh'.  Good ol' George Noory.  Tommy must be just off stage, a chair, soda and a bag of chips, ready for any emergency.

[ItsOver]

After last night's C2C disaster, I was hoping Jorch could find somebody different as a guest.  Darn it.  He missed the creator of the pizza roll, Jeno Palucci, who passed away last year.  I guess maybe he could channel him or check out some portals and angels but I don't want to get my hopes up.

A supposed quote from Jeno brought a smile to my face.  Paulucci sold his Jeno's Pizza Rolls brand to the Pillsbury Corporation for $135 million.  He later regretted selling the pizza rolls, saying, “I should’ve kept the pizza roll. It’s something that’ll damn near live forever.”  Hahahahah..... beware, Jorch, pizza rolls are eternal.  I wonder if they're something like vampires?

[PB the Deplorable]

George coined a new another word - introducing his guest by saying 'let's welkhim' at the 1 min mark.

I didn't even notice that the first time.  It's as clear as day.  Said with gusto.  'Let's Welk Him'.

I'd like to know at what age George learned English. 
 

[ItsOver]

....I wonder what he's whispering in people ears as he heads up the aisle to the 'stage'.....

That opens up a nice revolting topic.  What could Jorch be whispering in people's ears?  Uuuuuuuuuu... yuck!  Maybe it's "Wanna seem my mouth?  I've got a flashlight wif me....."

[PB the Deplorable]

After last night's C2C disaster, I was hoping Jorch could find somebody different as a guest.  Darn it.  He missed the creator of the pizza roll, Jeno Palucci, who passed away last year...

A supposed quote from Jeno brought a smile to my face.  Paulucci sold his Jeno's Pizza Rolls brand to the Pillsbury Corporation for $135 million.  He later regretted selling the pizza rolls, saying, “I should’ve kept the pizza roll. It’s something that’ll damn near live forever.” ...

Until George had his episode, I'd never even heard of those things.  I bet they would live forever though - no need for an 'expired by' date.

[ItsOver]

I didn't even notice that the first time.  It's as clear as day.  Said with gusto.  'Let's Welk Him'.

I'd like to know at what age George learned English. 

I believe Jorch grew-up in the Detroit area.  Maybe it's his version of Motown sound.

[PB the Deplorable]

That opens up a nice revolting topic.  What could Jorch be whispering in people's ears?  Uuuuuuuuuu... yuck!  Maybe it's "Wanna seem my mouth?  I've got a flashlight wif me....."

You're sitting there, finally he's announced and the famous man comes down the aisle.  Rather than twist around ackwardly in the chair, you're not warching him.  Suddenly you see a shadow and feel a presence, some warm moist air on your ear, maybe a bit of sprayed spittle, a whispered 'how arre yew, glad yew cud come' as he moves on.

[Jasmine]

I wanna see Charo and Suzanne Somers as guests on Georgie's new teluvishun show. I wanna see Purina Dog Chow as the offishal shponsher, with Georgie doing on-air commershals for Purina. I wanna see Georgie begin each show by singing a song for his live shtoodio audiensh...with lots of closhe-upsh of Georgie as he croons and swoons like Sinatra. I wanna see Linda Moulton-Howe come on, and she and Georgie do an on-air cooking segment...she'll make Beef Wellington, and Georgie will ask her, as she prepares the dish, "Linda, I gotta ask you this. Is this beef from an unexshplained mutilated cow, mutilated by aliens?" She'll reply, "Well, George, the beef was slaughtered and cut in Alberta, Canada, so yes, it's been mutilated by aliens." At that point, Tommy will hold up a huge "LAUGH!" sign at the shtoodio audiensh.

For dessert, Linda will prepare - on-air - her deep fried sugar and honey "crop circles".

That is all.

[driton]

Beyond Belief with George Noory - GMOs with Jeffery M. Smith

At the 32:45 mark,listen to his vacuum analogy...
What a total buffoon.

[HorrorRetro]

I lasted 45 seconds into that video before I had to close it up.  What a buffoon.  The word that comes to mind when I see his Kiwi shoe polished hair and Men's Warehouse gangster get up is smarmy.   :

[sleeplessinca]

i watched snoory's show and am positive that:

A)  we should take a drink every time he says "That's amazing!"

and

B)  he missed his calling as a straight guy in infomercials

[ItsOver]

I wanna see Charo and Suzanne Somers as guests on Georgie's new teluvishun show. I wanna see Purina Dog Chow as the offishal shponsher, with Georgie doing on-air commershals for Purina. I wanna see Georgie begin each show by singing a song for his live shtoodio audiensh...with lots of closhe-upsh of Georgie as he croons and swoons like Sinatra. I wanna see Linda Moulton-Howe come on, and she and Georgie do an on-air cooking segment...she'll make Beef Wellington, and Georgie will ask her, as she prepares the dish, "Linda, I gotta ask you this. Is this beef from an unexshplained mutilated cow, mutilated by aliens?" She'll reply, "Well, George, the beef was slaughtered and cut in Alberta, Canada, so yes, it's been mutilated by aliens." At that point, Tommy will hold up a huge "LAUGH!" sign at the shtoodio audiensh.

For dessert, Linda will prepare - on-air - her deep fried sugar and honey "crop circles".

That is all.

Wow, what a reminder of all those old '60s variety shows. Like a bizarro world version of "The Dean Martin Show," where here the host can't sing, has no other discernible talent, and creeps out even little old ladies.    I'm sure Jorch can't even handle his liquor.