George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[onan]

Wow. Just.....wow. I thought I already knew how oblivious he was to his sheer badness...but I knew nothing. He actually said, near the end of the Charles Trenet/Bobby Darin song "La Mer/Beyond The Sea", that "this sounds like karaoke". Sounds like karaoke? Ye gods and little fishes, man - you're singing to a bunch of menopausal women backed up by a boombox playing a $1.99 cd of the instrumental parts of songs popular with middle-aged shower-singers, and you say your performance sounds like karaoke!? Seriously, are you mentally ill?!

This man has to be one of the most totally self-unaware persons in the history of the species.

"
    Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a
    trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the
    synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory
    of men. Verily I say unto you, they have their reward.
    But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know
    what thy right hand doeth."

   Matthew 6:2-3, KJV

I honestly don't know how you guys do it. I tried last night to listen... I have such contempt, that I find no pleasure even in ridiculing his performance while listening. The second I hear his voice I want to turn it off. How anyone can get past 10 minutes, let along a few hours, shows a level of tenacity or misanthropy I don't have.

I was going to call in last night to prank him. I wrote notes on what to say... couldn't do it.

[Sardondi]

I honestly don't know how you guys do it. I tried last night to listen... I have such contempt, that I find no pleasure even in ridiculing his performance while listening. The second I hear his voice I want to turn it off. How anyone can get past 10 minutes, let along a few hours, shows a level of tenacity or misanthropy I don't have.

I was going to call in last night to prank him. I wrote notes on what to say... couldn't do it.

Listen? Not in years, because my reaction is the same as yours:frustration, anger, despair. I just troll the Compendium for likely fodder, and I will go visit the vids and stuff. Anything more is fatal.

[lonevoice]

I honestly don't know how you guys do it. I tried last night to listen... I have such contempt, that I find no pleasure even in ridiculing his performance while listening. The second I hear his voice I want to turn it off. How anyone can get past 10 minutes, let along a few hours, shows a level of tenacity or misanthropy I don't have.

I was going to call in last night to prank him. I wrote notes on what to say... couldn't do it.

Onan, a lot of the people posting on this thread during the show aren't listening to it.  I'm not, and haven't even once for the last many years.   But, since the Jorch meltdown became so epic, and I'm a fan of watching karma in action, I've found that one can play along just fine by reading this thread during the show.  The play-by-play commentary from those who are listening is usually entertaining, and, if you keep an eye out for the poster Maxwell, he always posts an mp3 file within 10 minutes of Dave saying anything spectacularly douchetastic. 

[UnscreenedCaller]

Assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward. 3 But when you do a charitable deed, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,
   Matthew 6:1-3, New KJV

Stunning that this is a problem for a man who has a tough time letting his left brain know what his right brain is thinking.

[Sardondi]

Stunning that this is a problem for a man who has a tough time letting his left brain know what his right brain is thinking.

Winner! - Today's lulz award.

[ItsOver]

Listen to Jorch? Very rarely and only for very short periods.  Mainly as an insanity check. "Yep...Dave still sucks."

[Black Hole]

I suggest a class-action lawsuit against that suck hole.  George Noory is like one of those pharmaceutical commercials on TV.  Listening to him may cause some of the following in most intelligent people:

Migraines
Vertigo
Vomiting
Disgust
Loss of sex drive
Frustration
Mood swings

And in a number of people:

Bleeding from the ears
Deranged thoughts and hallucinations
Violent behavior
Suicide

[popple]

but Noory's beyond belief show is expensive too...

Yup. $10 a month. Members here have been able to get sirius for $8 a month. At least there is haggling with sirius. If you have gaiam + the coast insiders club it's about the same as the sirius subscription. OFC I knew if Jorch was to talk about Art's new show he would try to make it sound unappealing and that he'll always have a FREE show. Well, I'm ok with paying for quality. And people who cannot afford a subscription can always find torrents and listen to them in place of current C2C.

[bateman]

[attach=1]

[Black Hole]

I'll leave with this comforting thought.

Perhaps during Noory's "next" out of body experience or the kind of thing where you died and come back, he'll be strongly encouraged not to.

[popple]

Noory said 'coastgab' like someone swallowing a dose of cod liver oil, and his happy announcement about Art's return sounded forced and insincere.

He should get with the times, IT'S BELLGAB.COM! 

[Flaxen Hegemony]

I'm off to a thrilling academic conference (but I repeat myself, pfffftt..), and probably won't be rolling through this part of town again until Art goes live.

It was nice to see many of the familiar and friendly faces still here from a few years ago, as well as some new ones.  Sorry if my posts have sounded like long-winded meandering lectures at times.  I'm accustomed to babbling in front of 20 year olds every day, so my natural tendency is to use more words (I've ordered a bikini-clad editor to follow me around 24/7, which will hopefully help).  Tonality is difficult to convey in online forums, but be assured, I sure as hell don't think I'm smarter than any of you.  The moment you perceive intellectual superiority over a person, the chance of you learning anything new from them diminishes to zero.

Now.. better looking  than all of you?  Different story... 

Egads... see what happened?  I sound like I'm lecturing in a post where I apologize for sounding like lecturing.  Meta-lecturing! 

Anyway, I'll see you all in a few weeks.  Be safe and snarky!

[PB the Deplorable]

I'll never understand why George spends his time buffing and plumping his resume, chasing after other gigs that he sucks at - like 'writing' 'books', the DVDs, George Time/George's Insider Club/Talk to George stuff, the various failed TV show ventures, and now these GiamTV YouTube video monstrosities, and thinking up excuses for his lazy approach to the show (redundancies are for 'the new listeners', doing interviews cold - on the fly - are 'more fresh', failure to challenge guests or be skeptical in any way is because the show 'isn't about yelling and screaming', no prep work at all because he 'can't read every book by every guest') - on and on, excuse after excuse.

If instead of all that he would have spent time flipping through a few books, done a little research on guests, prepared a few questions based on that instead of using a stack of the same questions he asks every guest, maybe he could have developed into an ok interviewer over time.  Reading a newspaper once n awhile and taking a few courses at the local community college on subjects like history, geography, intro to science, etc a few day a week couldn't have hurt.  Are there classes on idioms, grammar, word definitions and general use of the language?

Wanting to be good at your job isn't enough.  It takes effort.  For some reason George either cannot understand this, or will not.  And now, even if he were to want to, anything he does is going to be too little too late.

[Gemstone]

I suggest a class-action lawsuit against that suck hole.  George Noory is like one of those pharmaceutical commercials on TV.  Listening to him may cause some of the following in most intelligent people:

Migraines
Vertigo
Vomiting
Disgust
Loss of sex drive
Frustration
Mood swings

And in a number of people:

Bleeding from the ears
Deranged thoughts and hallucinations
Violent behavior
Suicide

I have never posted anything here but I LOVE this sight! It is reassuring to see I'm not alone in feeling that Jorch is less than fabulous.  Bateman - BRAVO! Please add me to your fan base! I enjoy how funny and articulate all these posts are.  I cannot wait for September 16th.  We already have our Sirius subscription.

[onan]

Anyway, I'll see you all in a few weeks.  Be safe and snarky!

I'll see your flip on the flop.

[popple]

I don't think he or Prem Rat were prepared for the landslide of pent up frustration and anger about C2C that Art's announcement unleashed, and now they're covering their asses, trying to rebrand Noory as a nice guy when he really isn't. Too late: that ship sailed when he dropped Art from the closing credits.

Oh that silly Jorch. He just forgot it. Like he forgot to ever mention the return when it first was announced. Just pretend it's not there and it will go away. All will be well. Art is the monster in little Jorchies closet.

[Flaxen Hegemony]

I'll see your flip on the flop.

Any requests from the islands? 

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I guess I will have to get my satellite radio hooked up finally.

I am so pleased that Art will be back.

There were lots of indications that Snoorey is insecure last night. 
He mentioned about "kidding around" with Art threatening his show
He said Art returning would be a problem for him
They played a lot of Arts bumper music - no Lady in Red or Frank Sinatra
Mentioned Coastgab as loyal listeners - who us?
Replayed his one "classic" call (betcha can't guess which one that is)
Dropped Ian Punnet from the sign-off

I also couldn't stand him incorrectly calling "contrails" jet trails. 
I have never heard of a jet trail.

On to 1000

I'll give him a pass on the jet trails.  He probably didn't want to distinguish them as contrails or chemtrails without providing his 'evidence' first.  As for his ode to Art, I can't speak to it's sincerity.  It sounded like he was choking on the whole thing like a hot pizza roll, and previous indicators suggest it wasn't sincere at all, but it's not my call to make.

[nooryisawesome]

I give dave credit for mentioning art. I give him credit for the shout out to coast gab. Like it or not this is the most active forum of C2C listners, even if we do dislike Noory.

I think he was legit when he said thank god he didnt want to come back to this show... That would cause some problems. Remember in January Ar said premier offered him ANY time slot he wanted. Jorch knows he is premier's second choice.

Good for George for mentioning it. He also admitted Art is better than him. Flat out Bell is the best at what he does. Living Legend.

that said George Noory STILL SUCKS.

[onan]

Any requests from the islands?

Pics or it didn't happen.

[Roy Hinkley]

"Take heed that you do not do your charitable deeds before men, to be seen by them. Otherwise you have no reward from your Father in heaven. 2 Therefore, when you do a charitable deed, do not sound a trumpet before you as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory from men. Assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward. 3 But when you do a charitable deed, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,

   Matthew 6:1-3, New KJV

Too bad Dave is only "religious" when it fits the moment.  Otherwise he is just "shpeerchule" so he doesn't have to follow those pesky Bible references...

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Onan, a lot of the people posting on this thread during the show aren't listening to it.  I'm not, and haven't even once for the last many years.   But, since the Jorch meltdown became so epic, and I'm a fan of watching karma in action, I've found that one can play along just fine by reading this thread during the show.  The play-by-play commentary from those who are listening is usually entertaining, and, if you keep an eye out for the poster Maxwell, he always posts an mp3 file within 10 minutes of Dave saying anything spectacularly douchetastic.

I'll try to do a better job of documenting for you all.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Stunning that this is a problem for a man who has a tough time letting his left brain know what his right brain is thinking.

That used to be a procedure for epileptic seizures, back sometime in the 50's or 60's (not sure about dates).  They would cut the corpus callosum linking the left and right cortex to stop the electrochemical feedback between the two halves.  The left brain literally wouldn't know what the left hand was doing (left brain controls the right side).  Is your post on this a coincidence?

[Roy Hinkley]

I'll never understand why George spends his time buffing and plumping his resume, chasing after other gigs that he sucks at - like 'writing' 'books', the DVDs, George Time/George's Insider Club/Talk to George stuff, the various failed TV show ventures, and now these GiamTV YouTube video monstrosities, and thinking up excuses for his lazy approach to the show (redundancies are for 'the new listeners', doing interviews cold - on the fly - are 'more fresh', failure to challenge guests or be skeptical in any way is because the show 'isn't about yelling and screaming', no prep work at all because he 'can't read every book by every guest') - on and on, excuse after excuse.

If instead of all that he would have spent time flipping through a few books, done a little research on guests, prepared a few questions based on that instead of using a stack of the same questions he asks every guest, maybe he could have developed into an ok interviewer over time.  Reading a newspaper once n awhile and taking a few courses at the local community college on subjects like history, geography, intro to science, etc a few day a week couldn't have hurt.  Are there classes on idioms, grammar, word definitions and general use of the language?

Wanting to be good at your job isn't enough.  It takes effort.  For some reason George either cannot understand this, or will not.  And now, even if he were to want to, anything he does is going to be too little too late.

Excellent post.  Paints a vivid picture of Dave.

[Morgus]

Too bad no caller in open lines last night asked Noory about his previous claims that Art Bell was "he's winding down folks, he's done"
You could hear in Noory's tone of voice in his Art Bell announcement last night that he was really nervous, didn't sound like he was truly happy for Art like he claimed.
Unfortunately Noory also said that he now has no plans to ever retire, he plans on hosting c2c until he dies...

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I suggest a class-action lawsuit against that suck hole.  George Noory is like one of those pharmaceutical commercials on TV.  Listening to him may cause some of the following in most intelligent people:

Migraines
Vertigo
Vomiting
Disgust
Loss of sex drive
Frustration
Mood swings

And in a number of people:

Bleeding from the ears
Deranged thoughts and hallucinations
Violent behavior
Suicide

OMG!  You diagnosed what I've been experiencing the past several years.  I'm serious!

[ziznak]

Jorchie in regards to planet X
"You can't see it with a cellphone!"

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I'm off to a thrilling academic conference (but I repeat myself, pfffftt..), and probably won't be rolling through this part of town again until Art goes live.

It was nice to see many of the familiar and friendly faces still here from a few years ago, as well as some new ones.  Sorry if my posts have sounded like long-winded meandering lectures at times.  I'm accustomed to babbling in front of 20 year olds every day, so my natural tendency is to use more words (I've ordered a bikini-clad editor to follow me around 24/7, which will hopefully help).  Tonality is difficult to convey in online forums, but be assured, I sure as hell don't think I'm smarter than any of you.  The moment you perceive intellectual superiority over a person, the chance of you learning anything new from them diminishes to zero.

Now.. better looking  than all of you?  Different story... 

Egads... see what happened?  I sound like I'm lecturing in a post where I apologize for sounding like lecturing.  Meta-lecturing! 

Anyway, I'll see you all in a few weeks.  Be safe and snarky!

I've enjoyed your posts and found them very intelligent and insightful.  I felt a little jealous frankly.  Sorry to see you go.  They should spring for internet at those academic conferences  .

[Morgus]

Noory went over the top at the end of the show when he read his thank you list and added with emphasis, "the father, Art Bell" 

[11angeleyes11]

Noory went over the top at the end of the show when he read his thank you list and added with emphasis, "the father, Art Bell" 

Maybe. . but that is an earthly father. . . George is the heavenly New-Age, healthy father. . Indeed, Indeed!!!!!!