George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Gumby, Dammit]

He has to be very careful about mimicking Jackson's voice in case he's ever asked to channel Janis or Froggy.  Or Harpo.

Thanks! I'm gonna be up all night laughing at that one now!

[PB the Deplorable]

I just turned this on. This is unfucking believable beyond even anything Noory would do!

That Michael, always the entertainer - even taking a break during commercials.

Ian has long been angling to reach George's level.  You made it, buddy.

[Gumby, Dammit]

Ya know, I don't mind listening to Ian on the weekends,  but this segment is just rank stupidity.

Rank! That's it! Ian should ask him since he's "on the other side" if it really stinks like rotting corpses over there!

[Mops]

Well since I guess he's got that falsetto down, maybe he can channel Barry fucking Gibb while he's at it! It'd be really funny to hear a dead guy sing "STAYING ALIVE" in a girl-voice, "Stayin' A-lie y-ive y-ive y-ive -yaaaaaa-ah!" (Heee Hee)

How deep is your love? No, ask him how deep was his love...

I can't wait to hear the channeler plot the location of the Mormon planet Osmond winds up ruling when he passes.

[The Professor]

Well since I guess he's got that falsetto down, maybe he can channel Barry fucking Gibb while he's at it! It'd be really funny to hear a dead guy sing "STAYING ALIVE" in a girl-voice, "Stayin' A-lie y-ive y-ive y-ive -yaaaaaa-ah!" (Heee Hee)

How deep is your love? No, ask him how deep was his love...

Well, now that you mention it, while
We have the channeler on the line, can
We get David Carradine on for the next segment...now
That will be riveting...

[Curtis Loew]

Rank! That's it! Ian should ask him since he's "on the other side" if it really stinks like rotting corpses over there!

No doubt  some of Noory's  dribbling callers will be waiting to ask that very question.

[Mops]

That Michael, always the entertainer - even taking a break during commercials.

Yes!!!!!!!

[MABUSE]

I can't wait to hear the channeler plot the location of the Mormon planet Osmond winds up ruling when he passes.

I ain't no big-city spirit channeler, but ask and ye shall receive a Nibiru-esque response:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kolob

**M**

[Mops]

Rank! That's it! Ian should ask him since he's "on the other side" if it really stinks like rotting corpses over there!

Believe you may have a song there

[Gumby, Dammit]

Well, now that you mention it, while
We have the channeler on the line, can
We get David Carradine on for the next segment...now
That will be riveting...

Yeah...two dead sex-fiends. Carradine, wearing a noose, will be behind Michael, riveting him...now I predict, this will be the exact point in the show where the channeler goes HEEEEEEEE_HEEE_HEE!!!!!

[Gumby, Dammit]

Michael Jackson, dead, just said, "Ohhh, I can't breath!"


Heee-Hee He!

[Mops]

Somebody channel 911!!! Michael is having trouble breathing!!!!

Wait a minute......

[Mops]

Somebody channel 911!!! Michael is having trouble breathing!!!!

Wait a minute......

....he's okay now

[The Professor]

Oops, charlatan was busted by a caller who
Asked michael for some private information...the
Spirit felt the need to dodge that question and
Try a little cold reading that fell flat...

Another demerit to Ian for letting it slide with
No comment at all...

[Gumby, Dammit]

No doubt  some of Noory's  dribbling callers will be waiting to ask that very question.

Ask him about bubbles the chimp! Michael, why did you give that chimp Xanax and make him rip that lady's face off???

[Supernormal]

I wish that the guest would channel Ian Punnett. The real one would have pulled the plug on this charade by now. 

[The Professor]

Ouch! Nothing worse than spirits doing
Bad reenactments of their death...bad acting plays
Even worse from the other side...

[Gumby, Dammit]

Oops, charlatan was busted by a caller who
Asked michael for some private information...the
Spirit felt the need to dodge that question and
Try a little cold reading that fell flat...

Another demerit to Ian for letting it slide with
No comment at all...

Uh oh. Sounds like Ian's going for the pedophile angle...NOPE! He let the charlatan dodge it!

"Noooo. Debbie was the mother..."

[Supernormal]

Another demerit to Ian for letting it slide with
No comment at all...

Now, he's asking questions to MJ. I'd say that he's gone from a demerit to an expulsion.

[The Professor]

Hey SuperN...

Somehow this would be more palatable
If it was Noory... The braindead interviewing the Dead...

[Gumby, Dammit]

You know this is REALLY messed up just from the standpoint of his death being so recent.

And ALL of these calls sound like total set-ups. Show-biz folks playin' rubes and fans.

Ian SUCKS for doing this with the friggin charlatan piece of shit. This cannot be emphasized enough!!!

[Mops]

Ouch! Nothing worse than spirits doing
Bad reenactments of their death...bad acting plays
Even worse from the other side...

Yep, Michael will be playing pool alone in the next painting.

[Supernormal]

I think the eatherial lines are crossed,
Michael clearly thinks he's talking to Oprah

Oprah would have been more of a skeptic. This charlatan makes the horse guy sound like Zbigniew Brezinski.

[The Professor]

New GNS award category:

Worse Show by a non-Noory

We gave a winner tonight!

[Mops]

You know this is REALLY messed up just from the standpoint of the his death have been so recent.

And ALL of these calls are total set-ups. Show-biz folks. Ian SUCKS for doing this with the friggin charlatan piece of shit.

Well, you know, it's not like Jackson is really dead.

Oops

[The Professor]

Now, he's asking questions to MJ. I'd say that he's gone from a demerit to an expulsion.

I blame you, Super, you were wishing for a ghost
Show, and now you got it..,

When the gods want to punish , they grant our wishes...

[Supernormal]

Hey SuperN...

Somehow this would be more palatable
If it was Noory... The braindead interviewing the Dead...

We all know how that would go.

George Voice: "Michael, what do you think about 2012?"

[PB the Deplorable]

New GNS award category:

Worse Show by a non-Noory

We gave a winner tonight!

And Ian claims to be an MJ fan, imagine if he weren't...

[Gumby, Dammit]

Well, you know, it's not like Jackson is really dead.

Oops

Wouldn't be shocked if the channeler actually was Jackson.

[The Professor]

Well, you know, it's not like Jackson is really dead.

Oops

I thought Jackson died filming Thriller, and it has been
A double the last 25 years..some say andy kauffman...