George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Nucky Nolan]

That could explain it, a change in listener base. I'm open minded about religion and belief, but it's not a topic I expect to hear so much about on C2C. Agree with you about the consciousness movement and those who come on Coast promoting their theories and books. None of these subjects make for interesting late night listening. Better reserved for the lecture hall.

Noory's views seem to change to fit his guests' views too. It's why he sounds like Hal Lindsey tonight. It's why he makes it sound like he thinks that the Book of Revelation sounds like the New York Times. Some people gain fame and fortune by putting square pegs into round holes. Hal Lindsey and Jack Van Impe come to mind. Noory almost blew it when he mentioned Nostradamus, though. He evidently forgot that most fundies never thought of him as a *real* prophet. It would be fun to hear tonight's guest's views on Edgar Cayce and how Noory would react to them.

[Nucky Nolan]

"Do people agree with the End Times scenario?"

Talk about a vague question! It wasn't "the conservative Christian" (that's also varied) or "your"; it was "the". There are dozens of such scenarios in my county, alone.

[PB the Deplorable]

... Nostradamus... It would be fun to hear tonight's guest's views on Edgar Cayce and how Noory would react to them.

False prophets, demon possessed of course.  George would agree and go to the p-fones

[stevesh]

Don't have time to read the last couple of pages, but did anyone hear the 80 y/o woman during open phones Fri/Sat night? The woman was married to a CIA operator who disappeared a few weeks after the JFK assassination never to be seen again? George probed with a few questions which was leading to some potentially very interesting material. George dumped her and kept plugging along.

OMG what a stupid man, he didn't have the awareness to take-down her phone# off-line to call her back or to pass along her contact info to a JFK researcher. I would hope that his producer is snagging interesting callers contact info for follow-up.

Be careful what we wish for. Remember wacka-doodle guest Presidio 'librarian' Douglas Deitrich stated out as a regular caller.

[DarkDestroyer98]

I'm getting tired of these pre-millennialism guests.  They of course pretty much talk about the exact same thing over and over again, doesn't matter who he has on about it, they all eventually break down the same stuff. It's boring now.

[Nucky Nolan]

False prophets, demon possessed of course.  George would agree and go to the p-fones

That's a tough call. Noory's head might explode like a blazing pizza roll. He hates arguments (back-and-forth discussions). OTOH, he would meekly defend people like Cayce and Sitchin.

[John Smith]

This case again illustrates how Noory ruins such opportunities when he gets a rare caller with interesting insider info.
Art Bell would take such calls and expand them and even invite such a person back on later shows for hours - thats how classic tales of Mel and his hole, Bugs and the dead bigfoot, Mad Man Markham and his time portal, etc came from.
With Noory such callers just get dropped so he can move on to more callers that are mostly just dumb, crazy, or ass-kissers.
Noory can't separate the wheat from the chaff as it were. He is more interested in getting calls from people who also were stupid enough to burn their mouth from a microwaved pizza roll.

Exactly, Knapp (maybe because he is a reporter) would have gotten that old lady's number. What wasted opportunity.

[PortlandDangler]

I miss the area 51 personnel hotline that Art would do.

[ItsOver]

Sigh....Art sure made radio fun.  Nooron just makes radio dumb.

[PortlandDangler]

It could be a PORTAL! Fuck you...tahiti village. Does he still have those promo's?

[ItsOver]

Hahahaha.... Tahiti Village?  Was that the stupid one with Tanya Roberts?  I can still hear the gum-smacking.  Like being solicited by a Bronx hustler.  Haven't heard that one in ages.  Fortunately.

[PortlandDangler]

Yes, Roseanne as well. While George and Tommy  masterbating in the background to George's Elvis song. Sorry for that image folks.

[Rico999]

I had to turn Snoory off too. Every caller talking about burning their mouth on some hot food and the roof of their mouth coming off....Oh the humanity! This is about the lamest thing I ever heard. And then to continue to talk about it endlessly! This show has sunk to a new low, as if that were possible.

Haven't had time to comment on this one but the funniest part had to be where he was running around the office with a flashlight showing everyone the roof of his mouth.  That must've been fucking great for anyone with the bad luck to run into him, right??   

I'm sure he left out the part where one of the PremRat employees placed a "kick me hard," sign on his back....

Still, here we have some dude that has a multi-million dollar radio contract and he's in some sleazy Van Nuys convenience store at 3 AM that just happened to be out of his favorite ready-made turkey san.....Why the HELL didn't he just go over the hill into Beverly Hills or WeHo or even stayed in the Valley on Ventura Blvd and get something GOOD to eat? 

Too tired to drive, George?  You can afford a cab.  For crying out loud, if you're familiar with that part of LA, you know damn well there's no shortage of late night places to eat....

The dimwit's mouth is burned and swollen and he can't breathe worth a damn and he calls.....TOMMY? 

I'm ready to settle for Mitch Battros as the full time host.  Come to think of it, maybe George does voices like Phil Hendrie and Battros is just a George "voice."  Wouldn't surprise me a bit...

[PB the Deplorable]

Yes, Roseanne as well. While George and Tommy  masterbating in the background to George's Elvis song. Sorry for that image folks.

LOL


Yeah Roseanne and Tanya

I heard those commercials on other radio stations, and the 'celebrity' parts were pre-recorded and exactly the same, but the radio show host had slightly different lines depending on who was doing it - they all had the fake excitement like they were really talking to Tanya and Roseanne and would see them soon at the resort though.

[ItsOver]

.....I'm ready to settle for Mitch Battros as the full time host.  Come to think of it, maybe George does voices like Phil Hendrie and Battros is just a George "voice."  Wouldn't surprise me a bit...

Well we've been "treated" to The Nooron doing Jimmy Stewart.  I'm sorry, that was Noory TRYING to do Stewart.  He should just stick to singing Elvis songs and making choo-choo train sounds.  :

[NoMoreNoory]

*phone rings*
George:Hello?
*phone rings*
George: 

Immediately after this bungled attempt at a 'comedy moment', Joorch gave utterance to a couple of sentences - including one of his favourite scenarios: watching people in restaurants - which defy any rule of grammar known to 'a humankind'. In fact, you could set this for school kids, giving them the task of trying to unravel the grammatical nonsense, translating into English from the original Nooronese. Here it comes, absolutely verbatim.Or should I say verbateem?

'That's a example of what happens with people when you bring your phones everywhere. I watch people when they go to dinner, two couples sitteen across from each other, texeen away. They're not even tokkeen to themselves anymore!'

There's 'a example' right off the bat, of course, and I suspect he doesn't mean two couples. In his normal description of people texeen rather than tokkeen in restaurants, it's one couple. Is this a confusion of one couple = two people? Discuss.
Then there's 'what happens with' which should probably be 'what happens to'. And you can say 'what happens to people when they take their phones everywhere' or 'what happens to you when you take your phones everywhere.' Or should that just be 'phone', singular. You'll notice also that I've taken the liberty of correcting 'bring' to 'take'. The idea that people are texeen rather than tokkeen to themselves, as opposed to each other, is just surreal. Presumably an example of people acteen weird. Did I miss anything?

To cram so many layers of confusion into two short sentences is a quite remarkable talent. Joorch, you have no need to attempt rehearsed comedy moments. Night after night, your entire show is four hours of comedy gold.

Oh, and in case nobody made this clear........you suck

[margoloo]

I just listened to the last C2C broadcast.  When GN said his daughter was withering in pain.........I ran screaming from the room.  Jesus!  Oh! and did we talk about George going to give money to listeners......but only if they pass a certain subscriber goal?  No class.  Also, would someone please explain non sequiturs to George?  Please?  Here is a non sequitur of my own:  Richard Hoagland is batshit crazy. :

[VictoriaPandora]

Picked up a station on my XIIA that re-runs C2C, been listening to George for two minutes, and got these quotes;Not hard to see why Clyde Lewis is number one now.




"cell phone texting has got out of hand. i mean now you get two couples in a restaurant and nobody is even talking to themselves anymore!"





"if i had a six inch leg, shorter than the other, it would be hard to walk."

Hey guys, it's been years since I have come round... but I transcribed a lot of GN quotes on some other thread a long time ago. I also mentioned Clyde Lewis before he was anywhere close to being nationally syndicated. But he is now, so find him. I want my Art Bell buddies back and all the good conversation that goes with it.

Is Michael still heading up the forum?  I've been gone forever. But when it comes to good ole George it's obvious nothing ever changes. I like John B. Wells though, they should hand the baron to him, but it just seems they want C2C to fail, and I guess Clyde is their back up plan.

GroundZero.ORG... that's where the smart talk is now:)

[McPhallus]

I like your enthusiasm, but the opinions on Clyde thus far are very mixed.

Picked up a station on my XIIA that re-runs C2C, been listening to George for two minutes, and got these quotes;Not hard to see why Clyde Lewis is number one now.




"cell phone texting has got out of hand. i mean now you get two couples in a restaurant and nobody is even talking to themselves anymore!"





"if i had a six inch leg, shorter than the other, it would be hard to walk."

Hey guys, it's been years since I have come round... but I transcribed a lot of GN quotes on some other thread a long time ago. I also mentioned Clyde Lewis before he was anywhere close to being nationally syndicated. But he is now, so find him. I want my Art Bell buddies back and all the good conversation that goes with it.

Is Michael still heading up the forum?  I've been gone forever. But when it comes to good ole George it's obvious nothing ever changes. I like John B. Wells though, they should hand the baron to him, but it just seems they want C2C to fail, and I guess Clyde is their back up plan.

GroundZero.ORG... that's where the smart talk is now:)

[DeeElf]

well, that's true too

[11angeleyes11]

The terms "withering in pain" is a quaint, descriptive Midwestern colloquism specific to the region in which Mr. Noory lives.

As for his comedic strength:

Mr. Noory is so funny. . . . .... .

that he is laughing all the way to the bank.. .$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
(of course, it was rescued by the Fed., but still.)

[Morgus]

well, that's true too

Thats Noory response #27.

[Unquenchable Angst]

If or when Noory goes to Hawai'i ,rather than pizza rolls ,he will find 'sushi rolls' made with spam and wrapped in Nori. One of the odd  effects of WWII on the Islands is the effect Spam has had on the Islands.It is everywhere and almost raised to some high esteem that you can not concieve of unless you spen some time there. I have heard Noory say Kona  but the other night I would have sworn he said Hilo. Any way,Spam is in and on about every menu there Poi,well there is something sad about that.It is amazing that no one seems to ever season Taro root.It is so flavorless.It is good  if you treat it like potato and through butter,salt,cheese or something ,Onions something anything.Poi is as tasty as wallpaper paste.It goes right over their heads there.
I lived in a town  that is about 50 miles south of Hilo. The town was a natural ampitheater when it came to sound. Sometimes people would have a party and IZ would come and sing at the party.So about once a month I got an Iz concert.What  a guy,good friend to all.Sad he died young.Thats what happens when you weigh 500 pounds on spam and poi.
That lady caller(CIA wife)  ,that was a bummer.Any body that was old enough to know anything  that might tell the truth and old enough they are at the end of life and willing to talk and jerknorry has to smurf the lady.All that is left are revelations from the death beds.and he muffed it.
I  am generally a regular listener and after I retired I tend to be awake all night anyway. How old is norry maybe it is alsheimers or scrappie or some other brain eater.
Somewhere in time was real good last Saturday ant Art was really good that program and the guest and topic seemed like it was 'today' and 'current'
I sure like this site and forum .You people real and are a hoot to follow.Even if you differ politically ,people still keep it on a high plane.
I did find this place when I put "Noory sucks" on my browser.

[popple]

"Every time I eat it feels like I'm being stabbed with a knife"

Poor Jorch.

[Eegah]

"Every time I eat it feels like I'm being stabbed with a knife"

Poor Jorch.

I thought it was safe to tune in and right out of the gate he brought up his pizza roll incident once again. I agree, Poor, poor Jorch.   

[Nucky Nolan]

I think George said it best - his listeners are Drunks, Druggies, and Delusionals.

You might have to be all three to enjoy his shows these days. You might become all three if you listen to too many of them.

[EnterDragon]

No body knows Noory, but everyone seemed to know Art Bell. I was listening to Micheal Savage the other day and he got a caller who spoke about food storage. Savage hung up on him and blamed his new late night time slot for the crazy callers. He then kept shouting- "I'm not Art Bell, I'm not Art Bell"!  ! I was laughing.

[Eddie Coyle]

No body knows Noory, but everyone seemed to know Art Bell. I was listening to Micheal Savage the other day and he got a caller who spoke about food storage. Savage hung up on him and blamed his new late night time slot for the crazy callers. He then kept shouting- "I'm not Art Bell, I'm not Art Bell"!  ! I was laughing.

        Very,very true. I always find myself saying to others " You know Coast To Coast(crickets-bemused looks)..uh, you know Art Bell's old show?" and that clears things up. Noory's Q rating is five percent of nothing and has little recognition, if any at all. Those who know of him, hate him!

[Sardondi]

I think George said it best - his listeners are Drunks, Druggies, and Delusionals.....

Or expressed mathematically, how we find the stupidity (Σ) of the Noory audience:

GN + D3 = Σ (∞)

[margoloo]

The terms "withering in pain" is a quaint, descriptive Midwestern colloquism specific to the region in which Mr. Noory lives.

Wrong.  It is not a quaint descriptive colloquialism specific to the Midwest.   Withering looks, yes,  withering sarcasm, yes, withering in pain, no.  Writhing in pain, yes.