George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[PB the Deplorable]

Art Bell used to ask some real off the wall questions, completely off topic, even outside the guests field of expertise.  Almost always these questions would either catch the guest offguard and get them to reveal something they maybe were not expecting to comment on, or elicit a response that was simply astonishing.

I think George's out-of-the-blue questions are a direct ripoff of Art's style (so what else is new), but lazy George was too dense to notice Art's unexpected questions had a purpose and got certain results.   George isn't about nuance or bringing out interesting responses or even good radio, he just sees it as an opportunity to ask silly questions and make silly comments, something to fill time.  He probably wonders why this type of question worked for art and not for him.  George does not 'get it'.

[El Kragen]

Listening to the July 9 program with SETI guy Seth Shostak, George drops this gem after a caller brought up that he heard there were dinosaurs on other planets:

"I would say it's probably pretty probable that somewhere on some distant planet at sometime there might have been dinosaurs"


Simply amazing that this man still has his job.

[Juan]

A fish-human - lusting for a mermaid sNoory?

[Pahrump Up The Jam]

Holy shit, thank God you folks exist, I had to join this board. C2C under Captain Noory is pound for pound the funniest thing going these days, and that's totally counting the 50 MILLION POUNDS the C2C listeners are going to lose during Jortch's "SHAPE-UP AMERICA" assault. (I think that idiot said the target goal was 50 million pounds, I'm not sure, I was laughing too hard.) I love that the astonishingly crap Photoshop method used to achieve his dramatic PX90 weight loss scared him enough to get back to a "healthy" weight. (Don't want to lose "too much", Captain!)

Of course, like everyone here, I love that Big G claims to have a passion for his work, years of experience banked during his broadcasting career, and the f--king dude can't pronounce words or do a cold read with the skill of a junior high student. (And, yes yes, they shouldn't be cold reads, if the Captain was really preparing all day for the show, as he claims. But we all know better, and that's why I love this gun-packing buffoon and his AM Hindenburg.) I f--king LIVE for the awkward pause immediately after the guest answers a shit-written, prepared-on-cards-for-the-moron-host question, when you have a delicious moment to guess whether he'll hit them with "so true", "it is, it really is", or "alright let's go to the phones". All the talents of a minimum wage telemarketer reading a script, and it's 100% dependable. Clockwork. Hell yeah, go for it Noory! "We've got a great one coming up tonight!"

Oh and hey, I don't think enough has been said about resident maniac Richard C's theory a few weeks back that:

A) Director Andrew Stanton knows the secret truth about Mars,
B) injected his film JOHN CARTER with the all the cold, red, torsion-field-hyperdimensional facts, but
C) shady, secret, Government higher-ups learned what he had done, the incredible INFORMATION he had snuck into his film,
D) called up Disney, and forced them to SABOTAGE THEIR OWN 300 MILLION DOLLAR INVESTMENT, by
E) encouraging bad word of mouth via bad reviews and "negative bloggers" to kill the film's Box Office, and thus, keep the information secret.

That bit was but a brilliant gold nugget among the usual trash found at this glorious AM Gun and Gem Swap Meet.

If I was Stanton, I would've grabbed Hoagland to do a separate commentary track on the Blu-ray.

Anyway, cheers folks.

George Noory SUUUUUUCKS.

[onan]

Holy shit, thank God you folks exist, I had to join this board. C2C under Captain Noory is pound for pound the funniest thing going these days, and that's totally counting the 50 MILLION POUNDS the C2C listeners are going to lose during Jortch's "SHAPE-UP AMERICA" assault. (I think that idiot said the target goal was 50 million pounds, I'm not sure, I was laughing too hard.) I love that the astonishingly crap Photoshop method used to achieve his dramatic PX90 weight loss scared him enough to get back to a "healthy" weight. (Don't want to lose "too much", Captain!)

Of course, like everyone here, I love that Big G claims to have a passion for his work, years of experience banked during his broadcasting career, and the f--king dude can't pronounce words or do a cold read with the skill of a junior high student. (And, yes yes, they shouldn't be cold reads, if the Captain was really preparing all day for the show, as he claims. But we all know better, and that's why I love this gun-packing buffoon and his AM Hindenburg.) I f--king LIVE for the awkward pause immediately after the guest answers a shit-written, prepared-on-cards-for-the-moron-host question, when you have a delicious moment to guess whether he'll hit them with "so true", "it is, it really is", or "alright let's go to the phones". All the talents of a minimum wage telemarketer reading a script, and it's 100% dependable. Clockwork. Hell yeah, go for it Noory! "We've got a great one coming up tonight!"

Oh and hey, I don't think enough has been said about resident maniac Richard C's theory a few weeks back that:

A) Director Andrew Stanton knows the secret truth about Mars,
B) injected his film JOHN CARTER with the all the cold, red, torsion-field-hyperdimensional facts, but
C) shady, secret, Government higher-ups learned what he had done, the incredible INFORMATION he had snuck into his film,
D) called up Disney, and forced them to SABOTAGE THEIR OWN 300 MILLION DOLLAR INVESTMENT, by
E) encouraging bad word of mouth via bad reviews and "negative bloggers" to kill the film's Box Office, and thus, keep the information secret.

That bit was but a brilliant gold nugget among the usual trash found at this glorious AM Gun and Gem Swap Meet.

If I was Stanton, I would've grabbed Hoagland to do a separate commentary track on the Blu-ray.

Anyway, cheers folks.

George Noory SUUUUUUCKS.

Welcome, have fun.

[McPhallus]

Holy shit, thank God you folks exist, I had to join this board. C2C under Captain Noory is pound for pound the funniest thing going these days, and that's totally counting the 50 MILLION POUNDS the C2C listeners are going to lose during Jortch's "SHAPE-UP AMERICA" assault. (I think that idiot said the target goal was 50 million pounds, I'm not sure, I was laughing too hard.) I love that the astonishingly crap Photoshop method used to achieve his dramatic PX90 weight loss scared him enough to get back to a "healthy" weight. (Don't want to lose "too much", Captain!)

Of course, like everyone here, I love that Big G claims to have a passion for his work, years of experience banked during his broadcasting career, and the f--king dude can't pronounce words or do a cold read with the skill of a junior high student. (And, yes yes, they shouldn't be cold reads, if the Captain was really preparing all day for the show, as he claims. But we all know better, and that's why I love this gun-packing buffoon and his AM Hindenburg.) I f--king LIVE for the awkward pause immediately after the guest answers a shit-written, prepared-on-cards-for-the-moron-host question, when you have a delicious moment to guess whether he'll hit them with "so true", "it is, it really is", or "alright let's go to the phones". All the talents of a minimum wage telemarketer reading a script, and it's 100% dependable. Clockwork. Hell yeah, go for it Noory! "We've got a great one coming up tonight!"

Oh and hey, I don't think enough has been said about resident maniac Richard C's theory a few weeks back that:

A) Director Andrew Stanton knows the secret truth about Mars,
B) injected his film JOHN CARTER with the all the cold, red, torsion-field-hyperdimensional facts, but
C) shady, secret, Government higher-ups learned what he had done, the incredible INFORMATION he had snuck into his film,
D) called up Disney, and forced them to SABOTAGE THEIR OWN 300 MILLION DOLLAR INVESTMENT, by
E) encouraging bad word of mouth via bad reviews and "negative bloggers" to kill the film's Box Office, and thus, keep the information secret.

That bit was but a brilliant gold nugget among the usual trash found at this glorious AM Gun and Gem Swap Meet.

If I was Stanton, I would've grabbed Hoagland to do a separate commentary track on the Blu-ray.

Anyway, cheers folks.

George Noory SUUUUUUCKS.

Great post.  Funny handle, too.

[ziznak]

I wanna hear the rest of the song Pahrump

[coaster]

Oh and hey, I don't think enough has been said about resident maniac Richard C's theory a few weeks back that:

A) Director Andrew Stanton knows the secret truth about Mars,
B) injected his film JOHN CARTER with the all the cold, red, torsion-field-hyperdimensional facts, but
C) shady, secret, Government higher-ups learned what he had done, the incredible INFORMATION he had snuck into his film,
D) called up Disney, and forced them to SABOTAGE THEIR OWN 300 MILLION DOLLAR INVESTMENT, by
E) encouraging bad word of mouth via bad reviews and "negative bloggers" to kill the film's Box Office, and thus, keep the information secret.

I must of missed this one. I'm not surprised though. Hoagland should never of stopped his meds.

[michio]

But what makes it more delicious is that George, totally unequipped to detect Sykes's subtlety and thus blithely ignorant of the fact that Sykes had indeed just disemboweled him in front of milli...uh, hundreds of....uh, a bunch of listeners, thought he was being complimented by Sykes!

Can you believe the stupidity of this man?!

                                                       [attachimg=1]

[Sardondi]

...C2C under Captain Noory is pound for pound the funniest thing going these days, and that's totally counting the 50 MILLION POUNDS the C2C listeners are going to lose during Jortch's "SHAPE-UP AMERICA" assault. (I think that idiot said the target goal was 50 million pounds, I'm not sure, I was laughing too hard.)...

Surely he didn't say 50 million pounds. Even George can't be that aritmetically challenged/cut off from reality as to the size of his audience. Of course, George is the one who admits broadcasting from a bunker. Hmmm. I'm surprised we haven't already seen a Downfall-style clip of George being told he's never really had millions of listeners....

[MDL5676]

Noory tonight made the unbelievable claim that he lost so much weight from that PX90 or whatever exercise routine last year that he felt he was too thin and had to put more weight on.

I happened to be drinking a glass of water when I heard George say this, and I'll be damned if that water didn't shoot right out my nostrils as my body involuntarily reacted to George's words that cames blasting out of St. Louis like verbal feces, blazing across the land, into my town, into my home, slamming into my radio like a supercharged particle of bullshitanium...

The Nooron must think that we're all as stupid as he is if he thinks that any of us believe that steaming pile of crap...

Also, did anyone else hear the show a few nights back (CIA Guy show maybe?) where George was talking to the guest and once again brought up his "attempted kidnapping in Mexico" story (which I call total BS btw) except that this time he added something along the lines of "Homeland Security told me that had the kidnappers been successful, most likely their plan would have been to have me repeatedly make withdrawals from an ATM until there was no more money to withdraw, at which point there would have been no more George."

I swear this man is more full of shit than a backed up sewer line...

--NOORY SUCKS--       

[ziznak]

Also, did anyone else hear the show a few nights back (CIA Guy show maybe?) where George was talking to the guest and once again brought up his "attempted kidnapping in Mexico" story (which I call total BS btw) except that this time he added something along the lines of "Homeland Security told me that had the kidnappers been successful, most likely their plan would have been to have me repeatedly make withdrawals from an ATM until there was no more money to withdraw, at which point there would have been no more George."
I swear this man is more full of shit than a backed up sewer line...
--NOORY SUCKS--       

Ah the Mexican abduction fiasco!  I just listened to that show earlier before Darth Wells and I could psychically tell he was going to react to the guests abduction comment with this story... once I heard him say "ya know a few years back in Mexico I..." had to laugh.  I hadn't heard the atm part and about his talk with DHS but you quoted him almost exactly as he said it.

[Oversoul]

Today's C2C show features --

Spiritual Path
Date:    07-16-12
Host:    George Noory
Guests:    Charles Upton

Author Charles Upton, a lifelong student of comparative religion and metaphysics, has for the past quarter-century been a traveler on the Sufi path.  He'll discuss how the globalist elites are attempting to manipulate our spirituality to create a system which is the enemy of traditional religions, including Christianity and Islam.

I doubt if Noory will be competent or intellectual enough (how about intelligent, too) to make a good show out of this otherwise interesting and promising program. 

[Sardondi]

Today's C2C show features -- re: Charles Upton

I doubt if Noory will be competent or intellectual enough (how about intelligent, too) to make a good show out of this otherwise interesting and promising program. 

But I guarantee Noory will ask him, "Do you think the Anti-Christ is alive now?"

[BobGrau]

Surely he didn't say 50 million pounds...

Shouldn't that be DOLLARS?

[Sardondi]

Shouldn't that be DOLLARS?

Heh. "Just send 'em right on in so that Tom and I can verify your amount, and then you can have your name put on our 'Board Of Champions.'"

[analog kid]

[Pahrump Up The Jam]

Surely he didn't say 50 million pounds. Even George can't be that aritmetically challenged/cut off from reality as to the size of his audience.

"To get science fiction for a moment Sardondi, would the earth losing 50 Million Pounds could possibly cause a shift in the axis of the planet earth?"

- Poorly-written prepared question, as read by George Noory

George was talking to the guest and once again brought up his "attempted kidnapping in Mexico" story (which I call total BS btw)

Anytime that gasbag brings up the phantom "Mexican Rundown" story, I always picture Jortch in the Harrison Ford role, fighting for his very life in the middle of CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER, with Drug Lord rockets and machine gun fire raining down on him, as he makes his escape from a well-orchestrated Cartel Kidnapping. This host is a hero, you understand. A man of the world, and a hero.

Also, CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER's poster rings true for the Hapless Captain of C2C: the tagline reads: "Truth needs a soldier."

OBVIOUSLY the man is interested in getting to the truth. Why else have the President and Co-founder of eFoods on the air during a news segment, misrepresent him as a "Safety Expert", allow him to suggest listeners buy dry foods, and never mention he's a sponsor of the show?

It's almost like he should have kicked the guy off the air or something.

[HAL 9000]

Surely he didn't say 50 million pounds...

Correct - he said 15 million.

[coaster]

Noory's kidnapping story consisted of one guy, who may or may not of been mexican, giving him a weird look while he was walking down the street. The rest of the story is made up bullshit. Who the hell would want to kidnap him? once they figured out who he was, they would pay him to go away.

[DAE]

George Noory SUUUUUUCKS.

Password accepted.  Welcome to the club!

[PB the Deplorable]

Correct - he said 15 million.

George long ago lost 15 millions pounds worth of listeners..

[Sardondi]

Correct - he said 15 million.

Well then, that's whores of a diffident collar. That should be a snap for George's disciples. Let's see, with the C2C audience at a very generous 500,000 per night, that's a only 30 pounds per listener. LIke I said, should be a snap. Well, if there's no time limit: losing 30 pounds is simply cutting out 1 pat of butter per day...for 8 years. That's a piece of cake celery.

...I always picture Jortch in the Harrison Ford role, fighting for his very life in the middle of CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER, with Drug Lord rockets and machine gun fire raining down on him, as he makes his escape from a well-orchestrated Cartel Kidnapping. This host is a hero, you understand. A man of the world, and a hero.

Also, CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER's poster rings true for the Hapless Captain of C2C: the tagline reads: "Truth needs a soldier."...

"Ta-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa" is the theme music of the movie of his life that George plays on a loop in his head.

[ziznak]

I think we should inundate that C2C address with emails explaining how much weight we gained this month.

[AktionT4]

Noory's kidnapping story consisted of one guy, who may or may not of been mexican, giving him a weird look while he was walking down the street. The rest of the story is made up bullshit. Who the hell would want to kidnap him? once they figured out who he was, they would pay him to go away.

When I hear it - it reminds me of this video:

10cc - Dreadlock Holiday [totp2]

[DAE]

FYI....

"15 million pounds of SpaghettiOs recalled"

http://www2.macleans.ca/2010/06/18/15-million-pounds-of-spaghettios-recalled/

[Pahrump Up The Jam]

FYI....

"15 million pounds of SpaghettiOs recalled"

http://www2.macleans.ca/2010/06/18/15-million-pounds-of-spaghettios-recalled/

NO! It's getting dangerous out there. Who can we trust?

Looks like it's time to call in "Safety Expert" Steve Shenk! If only folks would just eat 100% safe, dry, dehydrated foods.

Powered by powder!

[WOTR]

Well then, that's whores of a diffident collar. That should be a snap for George's disciples. Let's see, with the C2C audience at a very generous 500,000 per night, that's a only 30 pounds per listener. LIke I said, should be a snap. Well, if there's no time limit: losing 30 pounds is simply cutting out 1 pat of butter per day...for 8 years. That's a piece of cake celery.

I feel the need to mention that we are all getting older.  If there is no time limit I would suggest that the reaper will get every last one of us eventually.  Either cremation or decomposition will result in a net loss of tens of millions of lbs from Georges listeners.

[michio]

Topic tonight is 'The God Particle.' George is as happy as a little girl because of one word. The Higgs boson being called the god particle was a fluke made by Leon Lederman when he wrote his book of the same title. It was a working title at the time, according to Lederman, not intended to be published as such, but it happened much to the chagrin of non-religious scientists and physicist Peter Higgs who is an atheist. Higgs would have preferred to have called it the 'The God Damn Particle' because it was so incredibly difficult to find.

But facts be damned because George can't wait to pump up his IDiot guest who wants to have us believe that ID is all about the science. when it's no more than a semi-clever ploy to have religious creationism taught alongside evolution in the public school system.

And F'ck Noory's persistently annoying, disrespectful, and completely selfish habit of needing to ask every single scientist on the show why they aren't as spiritual and connected to the universe as he is. Here's the answer to your question, Simple George. It's none of your god damn business.

[Oversoul]

Despite Noory's usual lousy hosting and interviewing of guests, Peter Canova, the show's first half guest turned out to be an interesting and pretty informative guest.  He did better actually than the second half guest, Charles Upton.  Canova gave a good discussion of quantum mechanics and theoretical physics vis-à-vis gnostic mysticism.  He had pretty fascinating insights on the Higgs Field.  Remarkably good first half of the show.