Art Bell Dark Matter Bellgab Cookbook ...

[Falkie2013]

Since Art's allowed to write and he, Keith, Paul AND Art's cats could up with a better cookbook than the $noore, I was thinking of having people submit recipes and see if Art would go for it or not.

I might come up with a page of Falkie's Favorite Flavorings and tips.

But not how to burn a turkey.


So what do you think about doing this ?

[tertiaryimam]

Since Art's allowed to write and he, Keith, Paul AND Art's cats could up with a better cookbook than the $noore, I was thinking of having people submit recipes and see if Art would go for it or not.

I might come up with a page of Falkie's Favorite Flavorings and tips.

But not how to burn a turkey.


So what do you think about doing this ?

I think its a good idea. I'll give my recipe for Horchata coffee. You simply brew up some coffee in it, and instead of cream and sugar and shit, you put in Horchata. Its that simple, man. You can't go wrong!

[Textor]

For a REAL fast and easy late night snack:

Mini Pizzas
1 package English Muffins
1 Bottle of Marinara (Ragu, Prego, Etc. -- Your Choice)
Grated Cheese (Mozzarella is recommended, though any cheese you want is fine.)
Additional toppings.

If you have a toaster oven, you may use that. If you do not, I recommend using your actual oven. Preheat to 300. If you don't want to use an oven, you may also microwave, though you might want to stick the English Muffins in a toaster so you can crisp them first.

Cut the English Muffins in half.
Take a spoon and spoon out marinara sauce onto English Muffins.
Sprinkle cheese on top
Add additional toppings to taste.

Stick in toaster oven, cook until cheese is melted.

If using oven: stick in oven for about 10 minutes. Check to make sure cheese is melted, if not, leave in for 2 minutes. Repeat until done.

If using microwave: Get an oven. or just put them in for about 2:00 at a time, then 30 seconds additional if cheese isn't melted yet.

WARNING: As you are heating things up, these can be hot. Unless you are Noory, in which I'm sure they are cool enough to eat as soon as they come out, so just stick them right in your mouth. The recipe has special properties when prepared by Noory.

[weeberwubber]

Step one:  make recipe A or B

Recipe A  Taco chili

sautee a couple diced onions, put in slow cooker or soup pot.
Brown a pound of ground beef, add to pot

Also add:

1 can chili beans
1 can kidney beans
1 can corn
2 cans mexican tomatoes
2 cans diced tomatoes
1 28oz can crushed tomatoes
1 packet Hidden Valley Ranch Dressing Mix
1 packet Taco Seasoning, I use Ortega

Mix and heat up.  Optionally serve with tortilla chips and sour cream on top.


Recipe B   Tuna Surprise

Mix in a bowl:

3 cans solid tuna in water
1 can corn
1 can wax beans
1 can green beans
1 can kidney beans
a couple diced onions
garlic powder, salt and pepper to taste
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1/3 cup cider vinegar with 3 packets sweetener dissolved in it

Mix together and refrigerate for a while to let flavors meld


Step 2:  Eat some of it

Step 3:  Wait 20 minutes

Step 4:  Hold a digital recorder to your ass.  Your ass will emanate EVPs. 

Step 5:  Profit.

[wr250]

arts cat sez:

get cow
have chuck norris toss cow thru chain link fence to make cheezburger
make human cook cheezburger
profit

[guildnavigator]

I got a real good brownie recipe somewhere around here. My friends always say they taste magical. I just can't remember where I wrote it down...

[Heather Wade]

Redrum Sauce:

When making your marinara sauce, add 2 or 3 shots of spiced rum.
Simmer & stir.  Serve with fresh bread or on pasta.  Kick ass.

You're welcome.

[jazmunda]

I got a real good brownie recipe somewhere around here. My friends always say they taste magical. I just can't remember where I wrote it down...

Do you put any herbal ingredients in your brownies?

[georgesucks]

Is anyone going to put in the cookbook on how to make the World Famous Pizza Rolls??

[DanTSX]

Cigarettes and Coffee

[Heather Wade]

Cigarettes and Coffee

Ding.  Make 'em full flavor & a triple espresso on the side.   

[TheMan WhoFell ToEarth]

Is anyone going to put in the cookbook on how to make the World Famous Pizza Rolls??

Step 5:  Call 911.

[Unquenchable Angst]

Traditional (Southern)Vinegar Hot Sauce for your greens, field peas(crowder, black eye, purple hull, white acre creamer peas), beans......etc.
Bring vinegar to a boil (apple cider vinegar)
Stuff cayenne peppers both red and green decapped and washed into a bottle. Use a glass bottle I use old pints, boston rounds, wine bottles, whisky bottles. does not matter long as you have enough peppers to fill and you have a steel rod to poke into the bottle( heat sink) as hot vinegar may crack the cold glass if  rod is not there. I use some stainless steel kebob skewers.
I put a teaspoon of onion powder and a couple cloves of garlic, about half teaspoon of black peppercorns in with the peppers. pour in hot vinegar keep checking back till the air is finished displacing , cork or cap off when the air is finished and the bottle is topped. set in the refrigerator for a month to get the cayenne to diffuse in the vinegar.
never boil vinegar in aluminum or Teflon pans, use enameled , stainless, pyrex, corning only.
you can keep adding vinegar to the bottle for years. My mother used to save glass ketchup bottles for the containers but the ketchup caps used to need replacing every year or so as the metal caps will corrode away in time. Sometimes I have added an ounce of malt, or balsamic or wine vinegar to the apple cider vinegar for a variation of flavor. But I always use cider vinegar as my main culinary vinegar and only use white vinegar for cleaning and never to ingest.

[Unquenchable Angst]

If you herb your brownies or cookies: sauté  your herb in a little butter and or the oil you use to make the baked good. A little oil will release the oil soluble 'goody' in the herb. Otherwise the herbs loose potency when baked.

[Falkie2013]

http://www.instructables.com/id/Homemade-Pizza-Rolls/?ALLSTEPS

Pictures in the link above.

Homemade Pizza Rolls by shesparticular

Pizza rolls are one of the most wonderful foods ever conceived, but the store-bought type aren't available in all that many varieties. With a few simple ingredients, you can make your own and add any fillings and customize them to suit your tastes (some suggestions for yummy things to try out are in step 5).

Note: please be very careful when frying - the oil is very hot and can splatter and burn you.

Step 1: You'll Need. . .

Software:

Wonton wrappers (available from most major grocery stores, usually near the produce section)
Shredded cheese (I prefer a blend of mozzarella and provolone, but you can use whatever cheese you prefer)
Sauce (your favorite store-bought or homemade pasta or pizza sauce will work perfectly, or you can even try alfredo sauce or BBQ sauce)
Any other fillings you'd like (meats, veggies, fresh herbs - make sure to cook your meats and veggies prior to adding them) -
some suggestions are available in step 5

Vegetable oil
Small dish of water
Hardware:
Heavy-bottomed pot or pan for frying
Slotted spoon or kitchen tongs
Paper towels or brown paper (a grocery bag or small lunch bag works well)

Step 2: It's What's Inside That Counts

To help avoid air pockets in your finished rolls (which could lead to them bursting), you'll need to combine the sauce, cheese, and any other ingredients before filling your rolls.
Mix your sauce and cheese together. Depending on how many rolls you're making, your amounts will vary, but you want the resulting mixture to be cheesy but still hold together when scooped out - usually about 2 parts cheese to 1 part sauce works well (you may need to add more sauce depending on amounts of additional ingredients)
Cook any other fillings you'd like to add (meat and/or veggies) in a small pan and add allow to cool
Add your extras to the cheese and sauce mixture and stir to combine

Step 3: Wrap it Up

Add approximately 2-3 inches of oil to your pot and begin heating
Place a wonton wrapper on your work surface so that one corner is facing you (note: make sure to cover the rest of your wonton wrappers with a damp cloth while you work so they won't get dried out)
Add approximately 1 tablespoon of your filling mixture just below the center of the wrapper
Fold the bottom up over the filling
Fold the sides in around the filling
Using your fingertip, spread a tiny bit of water around the top edges so they're just barely damp
Fold the top down over the filling and press to seal
Place seam-side down while you finish making more rolls

Step 4: Cook it Up

Once all your rolls are formed, drop them gently into the hot oil (you can make sure your oil is hot enough by dropping an unwrapped/unused wonton wrapper into the oil - it should get bubbly and begin to brown within a couple of seconds)
Cook until golden brown, flipping using tongs or a slotted spoon as needed
Remove from oil and place in a single layer on paper towels or brown paper to soak up any excess oil
Enjoy!

Step 5: Some Yummy Variations

You can substitute any sauces or cheese (even vegan cheese substitutes) that you'd like (try alfredo sauce for a yummy white pizza). A few suggestions are below, but any meats (or vegetarian meats) and veggies can be used to suit your tastes:
Meat-Lovers: bacon, sausage, pepperoni
Veggie-Lovers: mushroom, spinach, peppers, onion, olives
Polynesian: pineapple, Canadian bacon, bacon, and jalapeño (optional)
BBQ Chicken: grilled chicken, red onion, cilantro, BBQ sauce (replace standard tomato sauce)
You can also make a delicious desert version with bananas and some brown sugar and butter.

[slippingaway]

Step 5:  Profit.

Indeed sir... profit.

Cheesecake Sopapillas
...They are simply divine.  Your taste buds will thank you. So will those who you share them with!

What you need:

2 cans (8 oz) crescent dinner rolls
16 ounces of cream cheese (softened)
1 1/2 cups sugar (1 cup for filling, 1/2 cup for topping)
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/2 cup butter (melted)
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
(Optional - Fruit topping such as cherry or blueberry. For a more traditional sopapilla touch, drizzle with honey)

Preheat oven to 350° F

Unroll 1 can dough. Place in bottom of ungreased 13x9" glass baking dish. Stretch to cover bottom of dish, firmly pressing perforations to seal.

In medium bowl, beat the softened cream cheese and 1 cup of sugar with electric mixer on medium speed until smooth. Beat in vanilla. Spread over dough in baking dish.

Unroll the second can of dough, and pinch the seams together on a counter top or cutting board. Stretch it out to cover the cream cheese mixture. Place the dough on top of cream cheese layer.

Pour the butter evenly over the top. Mix the rest of the sugar (half a cup) with cinnamon, and sprinkle evenly over the butter layer.

Bake on the center tray for about 30 minutes or until center is set. Let sit for about 20 minutes before drizzling honey or adding your fruit topping of choice.

Tip: Chill before cutting.

Makes 12 servings.

If you herb your brownies or cookies: sauté  your herb in a little butter and or the oil you use to make the baked good. A little oil will release the oil soluble 'goody' in the herb. Otherwise the herbs loose potency when baked.

Indeed, or you can extract all the good stuff out into melted butter or oil, and throw the bulk away. Now you have an oil or butter that you can use in ANYTHING that takes regular butter or oil.

Better Buddha Butter:

Step 1: Move to Colorado, or develop glaucoma/cancer/ or some other debilitating illness/disease and move to one of the other 15 states that it is legal (don't break the law, they are there for reasons, right?!)

Step 2: follow this secure link to learn how to make your baking butter better here!

Step 3: Use in any recipe that calls for butter, in place of butter

Step 4: Don't profit.  Unless you live in Colorado, then go ahead and profit (file the proper permits so you don't get in trouble).

[slippingaway]

Y'all think Art would give up his Pizza Punch recipe? I think his fans would approve AND eat that $h!t up!