Best Post Ever

[The General]

Do you have a favorite post?

This is a thread where you can post a link to what you think was the Best Post Ever Posted on Bellgab.
This goes back to 2008 when this place was called GeorgeNoorySucks.com, then Coastgab.com....

All users past and present have posted some amazing things here.  Profound, funny, earth shattering...
What post comes to mind when you think about the most memorable and best post on the forum?
Take some time, think about it, use the search function...

One rule...
You can't submit your own post.

[ChewMouse]

Sardondi writing about books, actual books.

The post made me cry but I didn't say anything, I didn't want a joke made of it. But he absolutely captured how I feel about my own library.

[The General]

Sardondi writing about books, actual books.

The post made me cry but I didn't say anything, I didn't want a joke made of it. But he absolutely captured how I feel about my own library.

good one.  Sardondi'll do that to ya.

[MV/Liberace!]

this post by lonevoice caused me to gut laugh perhaps louder than any post in this forum's 5.5 year history:

Meh.


I want Art Bell to install a mobile broadcast studio in his RV.  Then I want him to park it in my driveway and broadcast from there to make sure I get good reception.  I want him to change the name of the show to  'Art Bell's Gray Matter for Lonevoice'.  I want final approval of all guests and I want to choose the bumper music.  I want Art to do all the commercial voiceovers, but only 3 minutes per hour, and only for products I'm considering buying and interested in his opinion about.  I want every show to have the Lonevoice Only call-in line.  I want Keith to install a fast blast app on Art's computer that's for my personal use alone.  Speaking of Keith, I want him to make house calls to be certain all my internet devices have the latest software and firmware upgrades installed at all times.  I want Art to guarantee me that his ratings will smash, that C2C will die, and that his closing words every night will be "Dave Noorie Sucks."   I want Art to have a forum attached to his website, and when you click on the hyperlink it goes to BellGab.com, where all prospective new members require my permission to join.  If anyone harshes my buzz, I will ban them. 


Finally, if, and only if, all of my conditions are met, I will allow Art to pay for my lifetime subscription to SiriusXM because there's no way I'm going to pay to listen to radio.   

[UnscreenedCaller]

http://bellgab.com/index.php?topic=3422.msg80458#msg80458


Paper*Boy, Jorch's Eye Pad, September 21, 2012

[bateman]

http://bellgab.com/index.php?topic=3422.msg80458#msg80458


Paper*Boy, Jorch's Eye Pad, September 21, 2012

Omfg, how did I miss this gem??

[b_dubb]

There are some excellent posts one supernatural experiences thread. Some really grew stories. And the Eye Pads. Hysterical

[lonevoice]

This one, by sardondi

I love Grammar Nazis, for without them we'd have all been helping our uncle jack off his horse for decades.

I don't know if it's my favorite post ever, but it's the one that went directly to the part of my brain that will always belong to an 8-year-old.  Here, 4 weeks later, I still find myself thinking about it at random times. 

When I read it, I find 3 ways to punctuate it that entirely change its meaning.  But I keep thinking, "I bet sardondi knows more than 3!", so I keep trying to find another.  It keeps my inner 8-year-old out of mischief, I suppose.

1.   I love Grammar Nazis, for without them we'd have all been helping our Uncle Jack off his horse for decades.

2.  I love Grammar Nazis, for without them we'd have all been helping our Uncle jack-off his horse for decades.

3.  I love Grammar Nazis, for without them we'd have all been helping our Uncle Jack "off" his horse for decades.

I'd also like to thank MV for including my post here, it made my day.  I'd thank him for making my week, but then he might think I'm pathetic.   

[aldousburbank]

Any post by Gabor.

You can too i am share  my knowledge

I can help you , be a crayze  monkey are free ,)))

big and small sound

small and big

L or XL  ( music sound )

You can try is to be a feel crazy human now , )) free happiness

Her can you sing is in recorder  mp3 ))) sned is to MV .
Is free my jokey a round ,

- BIG HO HO
- small ho ho

- Hoooo
Say is  in were long sound you need create is in your brain  -  + hoooooo feel of brain  .

-Big sing  ..
-Feel happy buda

Is are for free happiness

No so difficult to  feel good happens and create life energize boost up power for yours  feel from your soul
brain .
hehe

My new song to MV  and is forum

Monkey love and pace !

Love love love craze love

I am were happy monkey  i can sing a crazy song ,
I am not drink coffee or smoke
I can not fire a weapon
I can have sex create family child

Monkey  love is world......

---------------- now  i have sing for is day -----

for you only haha



spreeed out my song

[Mels-hole1984]

A couple of months ago I spent almost an entire day going through the Archive of Old threads. I wasn't able to read everything but I certainly read a great majority. There were a lot of gems in there. I'll have to go back sometime and pull some of the good ones out.

[ksm32]

That post where that gabber posted that thing about the thingamagigs, I laughed my arse off for days.

[PB the Deplorable]

This was funny:

QUESTION FOR THE GROUP:
I'M RELOCATING TO PRC CHINA TO TEACH ENGLISH. HAS ANYONE FOUND A WAY FOR THOSE OUTSIDE OF THE USA AND CANADA TO SUBSCRIBE TO THE ART BELL SHOW VIA INTERNET RADIO? THANKS!

Great.  Hundreds of Chinese kids who will learn how to WRITE ENGLISH IN ALL BLOCK LETTERS.

[UnscreenedCaller]

From here: http://bellgab.com/index.php?action=post;quote=179595;topic=2322.210

? ? ? ? ?
? ? ? ? ? ? ?
? ? ? ? ?

[UnscreenedCaller]

"Can to Can" radio, with Art Bell.

[Foodlion]

Screw exercise. This kept me laughing hard enough to burn 2,500 calories since I first saw it.

[MV/Liberace!]

those coz memes from the AB Quits thread caused me to pink sock.

[jazmunda]

those coz memes from the AB Quits thread caused me to pink sock.

You made me look up the meaning of pink sock and now it cannot be unlooked up.

Just so I'm not the only one with a bit of bile in my mouth:

this is the result of excessive anal plundering; the intestines actually exit through the anus, forming a dangling mass, resembling a pink sock.

[onan]

You made me look up the meaning of pink sock and now it cannot be unlooked up.

Just so I'm not the only one with a bit of bile in my mouth:

yeah, unfortunately most of us have already been indoctrinated with not only pictures but several historical anecdotes as to its origin... yeah this forum keeps on giving.

[BobGrau]

It's a Hate Crime, I tellsya!

[shell88]

There are so many hilarious posts worth mentioning here.  This one in particular had me in stitches:

[attachimg=1]

[Catsmile]

You made me look up the meaning of pink sock and now it cannot be unlooked up.

Just so I'm not the only one with a bit of bile in my mouth:

Quote from: definition of pink sock

this is the result of excessive anal plundering; the intestines actually exit through the anus, forming a dangling mass, resembling a pink sock.

"Please, pray for Goatsy."

[The General]

There are so many hilarious posts worth mentioning here.

Tertiary has some gems. 
He also makes no sense at times,
which I can appreciate.

[onan]

Tertiary has some gems. 
He also makes no sense at times,
which I can appreciate.

yeah, if we are going to qualify posts with the need for sense... well let's just close up shop.

[The General]

yeah, if we are going to qualify posts with the need for sense... well let's just close up shop.

I often don't make sense.  And not just here on the internet.

[Mind Flayer Monk]

There are so many hilarious posts worth mentioning here.  This one in particular had me in stitches:

[attachimg=1]

Yeah I would listen to that.

[onan]

I often don't make sense.  And not just here on the internet.

sometimes I play aldousburbank at work...

[Foodlion]

You made me look up the meaning of pink sock and now it cannot be unlooked up.

Just so I'm not the only one with a bit of bile in my mouth:

Same here. I can only help but think it's an actual term that came about due to reality. Yuuuck

[UnscreenedCaller]

I didn't need to know about pink sock and ow I do. Eeeewwwwwwww

[Usagi]

Quote from: Michael Vandeven on February 23, 2012, 11:37:59 PM [Can't actually quote it for some reason.]

by the way... i told you not to use this new account you've created.  i specifically instructed you to use your original account.  you stated that you'd lost the password, i attempted to help you recover the account, and you sent me no further responses.  what is wrong with your fucking pumpkin head?  i hate you so much and wish you'd just go away.  christ.

^ "your fucking pumpkin head" had me loling for an entire night.

[Usagi]

Re: Any topics that make you immediately turn off the show?

               Trayvon Martin, Jersey Shore, Fisting, EU debt crisis, Steve Perry, Tim Tebow, The Lincoln-Douglas debates, "Don't tase me bro", The designated hitter, Taiwan, Sarah Palin, The surprise of "The Crying Game", Hale-Bopp, Chupacabra, yellow discipline, Supertramp, capitol punishment,the 1848 Revolutions, Marilyn Manson, "Friends", 9/11, Stratego, "Nobody's Gonna Break My Stride", Southern secession, OJ, gay marriage, Adding New Mexico as the 47th state, Teapot Dome scandal, Astro-turf, Kardashians, Benjamin Disraeli, Nixon wage freeze of 1971, Richard Hoagland, Obama, Ishtar, "Mac and Me", Israel, "Nappy Headed Hoes"...
       
              And DB Cooper.
         

The insertion of "Teapot Dome scandal" made me lol another whole night.  Even now it hurts because I'm laughing.  I'm not even sure why!

[EC  ]