George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Jasmine]

You know, the hippocampus is where George says he did his classroom work on his PhD (which I think he claims is in "Talking To Zoo Animals and Angels" but he's giving up - he says the foreign language requirement makes it a young man's game). Now I don't believe in throwing stones, but I have to wonder whether he really did his work at the hippocampus, because everybody knows hippos have to stay in or right by the water. So I wonder if George wasn't really at the pot-bellied pig campus.

LOL! As I mentioned previously, if you played a word association game with Georgie, and threw out "hippocampus" at him, he'd come back with "the San Diego Zoo!". George worked on his PhD through his correspondence course in journalism offered by ICS. He truly thought that PhD was short for "Phil Donahue".

Talk about word association...when I think of a pot-bellied pig campus (University of Texas aside) what instantly comes to my mind is the hilarious 70's screwball comedy "For Pete's Sake" with Barbra Streisand. Babs and her hubby are broke, and she relentlessly tries to raise cash (through relatives and the New Jersey mafia) to invest in pork bellies. 
______________________________________________________________________________

Oliver Kloseoff...LOVE your profile pic of Captain Pike! I loved that three part episode of "Star Trek" with Jeffrey Hunter and those three bald, freaky looking aliens!

[Jasmine]

Now the hard part people... lets find her.  There has to be an appropriate picture out there in internet land of this beloved methamphetaminated beauty.

Oh, God, ziznak, think of the karmic implications if we use a pic of an unsuspecting goth-trash gal, and forever re-christen her by the name of Krystal Methina Skullz! The poor critter!

BTW, Kudos to Eddie Coyle for originally bringing Krystal out on stage here for us all to applaud and throw Confederate dollars at her as she plays it on her g-string.

[Jasmine]

The David Wilcox show is pretty terrible. The idea that the illuminati are financing horror movies to condition the public is beyond implausible. Also the story about noory stiffing wilcox for lunch is totally devoid of entertainment value. I just Noory to call someone on there bullshit once.

David Wilcock (or is it Wilcox? Me confused) is full of shit. I also gagged at the Hollywood-illuminati analogy he used to further his theory, and his male chauvinistic inclinations...the scenes in films where a poor and helpless woman is hiding under the bed as the evil-doer enters her chamber...that she shuts her eyes and keeps her head down on the floor while hiding under her bed...that this action is a form of subliminal mind control projected onto the audience (masses) by the illuminati so that the audience does not dare fight back or question the corrupt, evil, and global  totalitarian agenda of the elite. If the woman hiding under her bed DARES to open her "eyes wide shut" and DARES to gaze upon the feet of the intruder-killer (dares to question or fight the NWO agenda), her fate will be instant extermination as the mattress is overturned and she is bludgeoned to death...blood everywhere. Wilcock's horseshit knows no bounds. Suffice to say that, according to "Edgar Cayce", all women are mere helpless and meek creatures...the intruder-killer-illuminati always referred to in the masculine tense...the woman is literally "below" the man - lying under her bed - as the "man in black" figuratively and literally stands above her. The woman hiding under her bed in the bedroom...the prime location of male sexual domination...penetration equates the ultimate power and authority over the female species.

Gee...perhaps I need to burn my bras? Well, that's my personal take on it.

Interesting to note his being in Amsterdam (and down in Southern France) to lecture Euro audiences...perhaps Wilcock wanted to milk the Euros fee (per attendee) from the unsuspecting foreign folks before they discovered him to be the traveling charlatan he truly is.

Sadly, there are suckers born every minute...enough to fill his coffers nicely.

[Eddie Coyle]

BTW, Kudos to Eddie Coyle for originally bringing Krystal out on stage here for us all to applaud and throw Confederate dollars at her as she plays it on her g-string.

No problem. Anything that can disract us from Noory's Nero/Sherman/Mrs O Leary's Cow approach to C2C is worth proffering.

[b_dubb]

Gee...perhaps I need to burn my bras? Well, that's my personal take on it.

Don't do that. You're going to need those when your milk factories begin peek production

[Jasmine]

Don't do that. You're going to need those when your milk factories begin peek production

Noory: "Coming up in the next hour, abiotic lactation, with Dr. Suuka Boubes. We'll also have Major Ed Dames on during the hour. Ed has conducted dozens of intense remote viewing sessions deep inside the breasts of hundreds of women worldwide and all across the planet! Wow. Mother's milk...does it ever end? And if not, how the heck do they do it? Who knows, maybe we could collect and store all this milk and ship it to those black kids in Africa! Get ready for that."

[ziznak]

Giggitty giggitty gooooooo!! ed dames head has exploded... now I'll never know how to remote view boobies... damn.  I actually think I may have dated Krystal before she went bad... such a shame.  The Wilcox show was horrible and I kinda noticed something about Noory that really bothers me when he does it... talk about doom and gloom kool-aid!! It seems like once the end of daze BS hits his lil ears he perks up and plays into the guests scenario sometimes adding his own little twisted twist to it... Holy C2C suckage BATMAN... when am I going to get a good show that isn't a replay of my homie Art?

[Sardondi]

You're going to need those when your milk factories begin peek production

Heeheehee! "Bras" - "Milk factories" - "peek production" Oh, man! That is so cool! *giggle* Is there a hole drilled in the girl's locker room wall for us to peek at their production! *snicker*

I love Freudian typos....

[b_dubb]

bewbs

[McPhallus]

bewbs

Cans
Fun bags
Ski slopes

[ziznak]

The potty mouths have officially taken over this thread!! boobies for everyone!!!

[PB the Deplorable]

He should be so embarrassed!    The dumb ass did not even bother to rehearse using and working the tuning fork before the show began, knowing fully well that he was going to make a special feature out of his tuning fork healing practice.  Unless, as usual he did not bother to prepare for the show, or worse, he was not even made aware beforehand that the tuning fork healing number was going to be an act in the show for that night...  He would appear to be just spoon fed with the show's program activities as the show progressed through the night, like using cue cards...

This episode could be a metaphor for George's entire tenure at Coast

[Sardondi]

The potty mouths have officially taken over this thread!! boobies for everyone!!!

I dunno, it might have actually cleaned up some - we had been talking about George putting the handle of a big honking C128 fork up his butt and then having Tommy hit it with a titanium rod....

...This episode could be a metaphor for George's entire tenure at Coast...

He always seems so surprised and helpless when something hasn't worked.

Poor George - continually caught off guard by life.

[Morgus]

bewbs

Noory is the biggest BOOB of them all 

[JohnnieB]

He always seems so surprised and helpless when something hasn't worked.

Poor George - continually caught off guard by life.

Indeed. And the thing is you don't know whether to laugh, get angry, or just feel abject pity for this exceptionally poor excuse for a radio program host.
It's just pathetic on so many levels...as we all know.

Abiotic lactation, Ed Dames zeroing in on global globes, tuna forks shoved up George's ass, Jasmine's impending pregnancy gas, Krystal Methina Skullz smoking Pall Malls down at the Pussy Palace, bewbs, cans, peeks, pork bellies, frontal lobes, etc. Yep, just another day her in Nooryworld! Hilarious posts, everyone!

Well, it being Sunday afternoon, my wife and I decided to play the C2C Alien Abduction Game in our bedroom. She extracted three ounces of semen from me, and I implanted a chip in her. She claims she was momentarily taken to another world. Then we both came back down to earth. I mowed the lawn while she made potato salad for dinner tonight.

[Sardondi]

...Well, it being Sunday afternoon, my wife and I decided to play the C2C Alien Abduction Game in our bedroom. She extracted three ounces of semen from me, and I implanted a chip in her. She claims she was momentarily taken to another world. Then we both came back down to earth. I mowed the lawn while she made potato salad for dinner tonight.

Okay, I officially declare Too Much Information: it is absolutely no one else's business that you and your wife had potato salad tonight...

[McPhallus]

Well, it being Sunday afternoon, my wife and I decided to play the C2C Alien Abduction Game in our bedroom. She extracted three ounces of semen from me, and I implanted a chip in her. She claims she was momentarily taken to another world. Then we both came back down to earth. I mowed the lawn while she made potato salad for dinner tonight.

Pics or it didn't happen.

[ziznak]

Ummmm I believe you no pics Pleeeeze!!

[HAL 9000]

...I mowed the lawn while she made potato salad...

Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

[JohnnieB]

Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

Hey, Hal 9000! I can remote view your breasts up there in Alaska all the way from my backyard here on the east coast! I spy...with my remote viewing, perverted, sex maniac...uh...scientifically researching eye...something...wait..wait...focusing...something... 32C...wait...TWO 32Cs! And you're not wearing a bra! This is unbelievable!

And no jokes about my wife's potato salad...it was simply mouth-watering. Very creamy. I couldn't get enough of it.

And sorry, guys, no pics. I'm a refined, dignified gentleman with class.

[ziznak]

LOL

[Jasmine]

Come, you spirits
That tend on mortal thoughts! unsex me here,
And fill me from the crown to the toe, top-full
Of direst cruelty; make thick my blood,
Stop up the access and passage to remorse,
That no compunctuous visitings of nature
Shake my fell purpose, nor keep peace between
The effect and it! Come to my woman's breasts,
And take my milk for gall, you murdering ministers,
Wherever in your sightless substances
You wait on nature's mischief!

- Lady Macbeth, Act I, scene v

[ziznak]

boobs... shakespear... <head explodes>... STOP! pineapples... its too much

[Jasmine]

boobs... shakespear... <head explodes>... STOP! pineapples... its too much

Fair is foul, my dear ziznak...and foul is fair.

*cue thunder and dramatic music*

[JohnnieB]

My dear Lady Macbeth,

I bow before thee and I shall rise to the challenge thou presents us with!

Coast to Coast is but a walking shadow,
A poor player named Noory
that struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more.
It is a tale of ghosts, witches, angels,  aliens,
and dark conspiracies
told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing!

[Harmness]

Don't do that to Shakespeare.  It just ain't right.

[Jasmine]

Don't do that to Shakespeare.  It just ain't right.

Hush, Harmness, before the three witches hear thee!

We shall desecrate the grave of the bard no more. You  speaketh wise, for George Noory is not worthy of such prose and praise. He is but a childish bore, and a fruitless crown was placed upon his head!

The midnight hour has come and gone!

Harmness, take this candle and quickly take your leave of this tower! Descend the narrow spiral stairs on your horse! The wind blows strong. Cover the light with thy hand. Get thee to thy chamber and bed! Let not a soul see you or your mare! Quickly now! Scram!

*Harmness exits on horseback - stage right*

[Sardondi]

Come, you spirits
That tend on mortal thoughts! unsex me here,
And fill me from the crown to the toe, top-full
Of direst cruelty; make thick my blood,
Stop up the access and passage to remorse,
That no compunctuous visitings of nature
Shake my fell purpose, nor keep peace between
The effect and it! Come to my woman's breasts,
And take my milk for gall, you murdering ministers,
Wherever in your sightless substances
You wait on nature's mischief!

- Lady Macbeth, Act I, scene v

But thou, to whom my jewels trifles are,
Most worthy comfort, now my greatest grief,
Thou best of dearest, and mine only care,
Art left the prey of every vulgar thief.
Thee have I not locked up in any chest,
Save where thou art not, though I feel thou art,
Within the gentle closure of my breast,

Sonnet 48

Okay, as near as I can tell, you really hurt Art Bell's feelings when you laughed at his junk - all he wanted to do was to get a little naked and have you hold his boob.

[Jasmine]

But thou, to whom my jewels trifles are,
Most worthy comfort, now my greatest grief,
Thou best of dearest, and mine only care,
Art left the prey of every vulgar thief.
Thee have I not locked up in any chest,
Save where thou art not, though I feel thou art,
Within the gentle closure of my breast,

Sonnet 48

Okay, as near as I can tell, you really hurt Art Bell's feelings when you laughed at his junk - all he wanted to do was to get a little naked and have you hold his boob.

My dear Sardondi, it is late, and you risk life and limb and squashed ass ascending the stairs to my tower room, as Harmness just rode down the stairs on horseback! I shall never place my hand on the man boob of Mister Bell!  I am betrothed and with child! Besides, if Master Bell wishes for sinful encounters, he need only summon that harlot of harlots, Lady Krystal Methina Skullz! She is a dark vixen! She is the devil's daughter!

[Agent : Orange]

...he need only summon that harlot of harlots, Lady Krystal Methina Skullz!

Somewhere in time, Dan Aykroyd just blew a load