Making tough choices

[paladin1991]

Last night I was randomly viewing some nudie photos of Asian girls with big boobs, and I felt that familiar stirring.  I was in the mood for what is euphemistically known as "racking the pump action yogurt rifle," "shaking hands with the one-armed sailor," or "educating Quick Karl" (and for you libertarians, "shrugging Atlas").

I got things prepared, including some paper towels laid out in a little stack on the desk in front of me for easy access.  I got a particularly good rhythm going with the porn clip I was watching, and felt the satisfying sensation of a giant load moving into the firing chamber (guys will understand what I mean here).  This was gonna be a good one.  I made a quality check to see if I had enough towels on hand.

With exquisite timing, I brought myself closer and closer to the edge until the moment of truth arrived.  As I crossed the threshold of inevitability, I could sense that this was indeed going to be a typhoon, and I reached for the towels.

Just then, with a golf ball-sized load traveling down my plumbing, I noticed that a medium-sized wolf spider had scampered onto the paper towels.  And it just sat there.  Watching.

Under other circumstances, I could have dealt with this situation cleanly.  But circumstances, and the clock, were not on my side.

How about you guys?  Have you ever faced a "tough choice" situation under time pressure?  How did you resolve it?

You had 'Guns up, Ready to Fire!'  Should have shot the little bastard right btwn his multiple eyes.

[paladin1991]

I like wolf spiders, because they eat all kinds of nasty household vermin.  Years ago, one spent much of its time exploring the walls of my living room.  When I played my guitar, it would come over to the wall behind my amp and stay there until I was finished (and no, "playing my guitar" is not a euphemism--that would be "strumming my guitar").  A fan's a fan, and you take them whenever you can get them.

Were you playing 'Stairway to Heaven' or 'If I Close My Eyes Forever'?

[paladin1991]

I have already inquired about that and have been told it is against the rules to post nudity here.

That's right.  One should only post ART. 

Soooo, do you have any art links?

[paladin1991]

I'm going to need a lie down after reading that.....

...with a bottle of lotion.

[paladin1991]

That's a tough one. Wolf spiders are friendly little guys.

But if you don't, you might miss the target and hit yourself... and that's not cool.
OMEGLE GUY JERK OFF AND CUM TO HIS HEAD

Is that Jizzmunda?

[Tarbaby]

Is that Jizzmunda?

ha! :-)

[Foodlion]

Is that Jizzmunda?

Nah, Aussies never waste a drop.