Author Azzerae's World  (Read 6463 times)

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Azzerae's World
« Reply #270 on: December 05, 2019, 07:32:44 AM »
So, a South African sex tourist to Indonesia doesnít like Americans. Big deal! Itís whiny Eurofags like him that have forced our hand politically anyway. Like most of the rest of the world you find it conveniently easy to blame America for all your many problems because youíre too fucking lazy to look in a mirror and do the work yourself. Waaa!! Iím all screwed up cuz America and orange man bad! Pathetic. Arenít there South African people on a South African forum you could be annoying?

Azzerae's World
« Reply #271 on: December 05, 2019, 07:38:12 AM »
Finally. Someone decent.

I was in Indonesia, but now I'm back in South Africa.

There is a public system, but its pretty terrible. I'm on a private "medical aid".

Sure: Serdep. "Zoloft" in American terms. Pretty run-of-the-mill stuff.

While I don't know anything about Prozac, as I've never taken it, this is my experience with Serdep/Zoloft:

At first, it gave me the worst headache I've ever experienced in my life. Like within 15 minutes of taking it. Then, that night, I ground my teeth to the point where I chipped my left front tooth. In the next few weeks, I lost my appetite completely. All I could do was drink weak tea - at the most. For about a month, I was dizzy, only able to lay down, hardly walk ... my heart even felt like it was going to explode one time. Like anxiety on steroids. Another time I felt "high," like numb.

Eventually, I realised that certain delusions I'd had waned (paranoia that loved ones were out to get me, that I was being monitored). I felt different overall, but I just can't describe how exactly.

Then came the giggling fits. I developed hysterical laughter because of a serotonin imbalance ... maybe even created by the antidepressant. And at night, I was having manic, racing thoughts that'd wake me up before dawn.

My mood stabilizer was increased at this point, and I was then administered an atypical antipsychotic, which gave me the most vivid frightmares you could ever fathom. I had bouts of religious obsession and hallucinations about the Devil and Hindu deities at this point. I guess my chemical make up was adjusting to the abundance of active agents rewiring all my neurons.

All in all, the antidepressant I'm on - combined with the other medications - has definitely reduced my emotional expression. But, for me, that's been a tremendously good thing, because I was always hypersensitive to the point of it being crippling, and just unable to focus or ever calm down in general. So I operate - for the most part - like a more relaxed, rational and calm person.

But that doesn't mean I haven't had bad days. It just means they're way less. I've only gotten depressed to the point of suicidal ideation (like I'm really gonna do it) ONCE in the past while. And that's a huge improvement, because I was on my way to giving up just a couple months ago, when I first got help.

I would say, on paper, it seems like its just been medication, but fortunately enough, my psychiatrist has provided some therapy along with the medication she's prescribed. I consider myself lucky to have such a kind, patient doctor ... one who (I personally feel) has gone above and beyond her job.

Oof! I hated Zoloft. It was the worst for me in terms of side effects when we were trying to find something that helped. I am glad you believe it's helping you, though. Mental illness is a difficult thing.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #272 on: December 05, 2019, 07:44:56 AM »
Thanks Azz;

Quite interesting to hear everything that came around to get you to some stability. It is true- a good doctor (one who cares- not just one who knows the symptoms and the "cure") makes all the difference for treatment.

Do you think that any of the side effects were "psychosomatic"?

I have no doubt that some people (likely you) need to have the emotions reigned in. I just found it interesting that my friend is actually finding the increased range to be a good thing. I think that his previous medication possibly suppressed the good and the bad to the point where it was harder to "feel" and to make a connection with others.

It sounds in his case like he almost needs to learn how to experience the emotions again. In your case, it seems like learning how to avoid the extreme highs and lows is probably more important.

Anyhow, good to see you around again...

I can sympathize with your friend. For some, feeling emotions are amplified. It becomes overwhelming at times. A lot of medications can numb a person so they don't feel anything when all the person is looking for is something to just lower the levels.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #273 on: December 05, 2019, 07:54:17 AM »



I'm currently home however enjoying your meltdown.... Just in case you wondered.  :)


#MeToo!

Azzerae's World
« Reply #274 on: December 05, 2019, 08:37:03 AM »
MD: swoops in first thing every morning and attempts to defend his little make believe friends online. Deeply lacking the intellectual capacity to see further than petty squabbles, he must police what is and isn't acceptable here (in his own mind). He has his title "BellGabber of the Year" to uphold, y'know.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #275 on: December 05, 2019, 08:39:44 AM »
If anyone has trouble with me being here, take it up with Liberace. Your knight in shining armour is the one who holds the keys, the very person who let me back in. Your gripe should be with him, not me. Its his forum. And he allows it.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #276 on: December 05, 2019, 08:41:48 AM »
All you bottom feeders can do is band together and try take me on in numbers, but I can hold my own, being the one true pariah on this board, and standing up for myself. You're the bullies, and the weak. All you can do is sing the same old song - unlike myself who is always growing and adapting.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #277 on: December 05, 2019, 08:45:52 AM »
Oof! I hated Zoloft. It was the worst for me in terms of side effects when we were trying to find something that helped.

I'm sorry to hear that. What were the side effects, for you?

Azzerae's World
« Reply #278 on: December 05, 2019, 08:58:00 AM »
MD: swoops in first thing every morning and attempts to defend his little make believe friends online. Deeply lacking the intellectual capacity to see further than petty squabbles, he must police what is and isn't acceptable here (in his own mind). He has his title "BellGabber of the Year" to uphold, y'know.

Just exercizing my right to free speech, you commie troll. ;)

Howís your imaginary fiance doing?  :D

Azzerae's World
« Reply #279 on: December 05, 2019, 09:00:02 AM »
If anyone has trouble with me being here, take it up with Liberace. Your knight in shining armour is the one who holds the keys, the very person who let me back in. Your gripe should be with him, not me. Its his forum. And he allows it.

I have no problem. I just wonder why you go out of your way to come to an American forum if you donít even like America or Americans?! Pleae, tell us what make South Africa so great in comparison.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #280 on: December 05, 2019, 09:01:58 AM »
All you bottom feeders can do is band together and try take me on in numbers, but I can hold my own, being the one true pariah on this board, and standing up for myself. You're the bullies, and the weak. All you can do is sing the same old song - unlike myself who is always growing and adapting.

Typical snowflake. You willingly come here looking for attention. We give it to you and then you frame it as being attacked. Pure manufactured outrage. Die in a fire now!

Azzerae's World
« Reply #281 on: December 05, 2019, 09:02:42 AM »
I'm sorry to hear that. What were the side effects, for you?

Yeah, cuz you really, really care. ::) ;D

Azzerae's World
« Reply #282 on: December 05, 2019, 09:14:28 AM »
No matter how succinctly I put it, you will never understand.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #283 on: December 05, 2019, 09:21:14 AM »
No matter how succinctly I put it, you will never understand.

Yeah, youíre just so above it all. ::)

VC

Azzerae's World aka Metron's EPIC MELTDOWN
« Reply #284 on: December 05, 2019, 06:02:47 PM »
If anyone has trouble with me being here, take it up with Liberace. Your knight in shining armour is the one who holds the keys, the very person who let me back in. Your gripe should be with him, not me. Its his forum. And he allows it.

It IS Metron that is having a glorious meltdown over your posts here today. IF only he had "the power" you would be banned for your treachery. :D

Apparently Azz has a new sugar daddy in South Africa on the West coast, his best "friend" Forest Dweller. Azz is moving in with him on Dec 11th.
Sugar daddy Forest Dweller, lol imagine the smell.

Azz is known to be half a man. Always on the bottom. heh heh

Metron is pussy shitting an epic tantric meltdown over AzzStab posting here. He is counting every single post to pin down and assault his loverboy Azz for nearing 50 or more posts here today.

Welcome back AzzStabbing Metron traitor and Metron counting... keep posting meltdowns over there. Bwahahaha! Azz really loves you.

What a glorious day in the neighborhood. "Would you be mine." ...Poor, poor, Metron can't own his Azz anymore. :D

Sounds like a nice hook-up with the DigitalPigSnuggler.  A match made in Hell BellGab.  Praise Lee and start the nuptials.

Metron is on the down low and in-out over 50 times today, so you've got a candidate. Don't know whether DPS is a member there? Azz is in AssStab land for any meetups though. You'll be doxxed both-ways or the other. ;)

Azzerae's World aka Metron's EPIC MELTDOWN
« Reply #285 on: December 05, 2019, 06:09:50 PM »
It IS Metron that is having a glorious meltdown over your posts here today. IF only he had "the power" you would be banned for your treachery. :D

Metron is having one of its epic meltdowns over AzzStab posting here. He is counting every single post to pin down and assault his loverboy Azz for nearing 50 or more posts here today.

Welcome back AzzStabbing Metron traitor and Metron counting... keep posting meltdowns over there. Bwahahaha! Azz really loves you.

What a glorious day in the neighborhood. "Would you be mine." ...Poor, poor, Metron can't own his Azz anymore. :D

Metron is on the down low and in-out over 50 times today, so you've got a candidate. Don't know whether DPS is a member there? Azz is in AssStab land for any meetups though. You'll be doxxed both-ways or the other. ;)

Me Tron was in Dave Darins live YouTube chat this afternoon.  If you haven't watched it, AND READ THE LIVE CHAT,  well,

BWAHAHAHAHA


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pyGyuO2Aw-k

Azzerae's World
« Reply #286 on: December 05, 2019, 06:11:12 PM »
Isn't it lovely VC? All sorts of meltdowns happening simultaneously, in perfect harmony. Hallelujah.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #287 on: December 05, 2019, 06:13:25 PM »
Isn't it lovely VC? All sorts of meltdowns happening simultaneously, in perfect harmony. Hallelujah.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9BNoNFKCBI

Azzerae's World
« Reply #288 on: December 05, 2019, 06:18:19 PM »

Azzerae's World
« Reply #289 on: December 05, 2019, 06:20:05 PM »

VC

Azzerae's World aka Metron's EPIC MELTDOWN
« Reply #290 on: December 05, 2019, 07:08:32 PM »
Me Tron was in Dave Darins live YouTube chat this afternoon.  If you haven't watched it, AND READ THE LIVE CHAT,  well,

BWAHAHAHAHA

Poor, poor, Metron is SoooOOOooo Butt-Hurt and still Doxxing over Heater. His MO.

Metron: you and Azz should move-in with Heater and feed'er and coach her back to her witchy stardom you found in her. Maybe you can hitch a ride with Jedi or Sean or Ace of Spades. Guess you've got to kiss Azz's Ass and make-up first. Nahhh! Lovers' quarrels. :D

Azzerae's World aka Metron's EPIC MELTDOWN
« Reply #291 on: December 05, 2019, 08:19:51 PM »
Poor, poor, Metron is SoooOOOooo Butt-Hurt and still Doxxing over Heater. His MO.

Metron: you and Azz should move-in with Heater and feed'er and coach her back to her witchy stardom you found in her. Maybe you can hitch a ride with Jedi or Sean or Ace of Spades. Guess you've got to kiss Azz's Ass and make-up first. Nahhh! Lovers' quarrels. :D

You can also count on Chefist to make the drive.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #292 on: December 05, 2019, 09:37:10 PM »
Azz says to Brig:

Azz had to leave "post haste" from Indonesia claiming and admitting he beat-up someone with Downs and/or in a wheelchair too or was it the same or another person that flew a drone to your window? Meaning, the cops might be after him soon enough to throw him in jail or out of the country too.

My memory is shot on that one. Reload Azz. :D
What?  And left Indo?  Where is Azz now?  Azz?

Azzerae's World
« Reply #293 on: December 05, 2019, 10:21:29 PM »
What?  And left Indo?  Where is Azz now?  Azz?
Never mind. 

Dickdr, you are a real AZZhole.  Just putting it out there.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #294 on: December 05, 2019, 10:44:24 PM »
Never mind. 

Dickdr, you are a real AZZhole.  Just putting it out there.

What did I do?!

Azzerae's World
« Reply #295 on: December 06, 2019, 08:03:50 AM »
This is new George Senda thread.  lol

Azzerae's World
« Reply #296 on: December 06, 2019, 09:37:35 AM »

Azzerae's World
« Reply #297 on: December 06, 2019, 12:19:02 PM »
If anyone has trouble with me being here, take it up with Liberace. Your knight in shining armour is the one who holds the keys, the very person who let me back in. Your gripe should be with him, not me. Its his forum. And he allows it.

I am grateful to Liberace for his open mindedness, and dedication to free speech. Danke

Azzerae's World
« Reply #298 on: December 06, 2019, 02:26:04 PM »
These are actually pretty good. Did you have any formal training or a background in broadcasting or is it just a hobby?

VC

Azzerae's World aka Doxxing Bellgab and Threatening Murder at BG Member(s)
« Reply #299 on: December 06, 2019, 02:50:05 PM »
I am grateful to Liberace for his open mindedness, and dedication to free speech. Danke

These are actually pretty good. Did you have any formal training or a background in broadcasting or is it just a hobby?

Are both of you Brig haters too? AzzStab is repeatedly threatening real deadly violence in his podcasts and posts against Brig. This is a long term pattern of violent hatred that has emerged to the point of threatening murder against another Bellgab member.

Free speech is not free for these violent purposes. Also, this is likely a criminal offense known as assault, so AzzStab is likely in violation of criminal laws in the USA and SA. I'm not an attorney, but "free speech" does not allow for threatening murder without consequences.

What is your opinion about this behavior that AzzStab is doing as a Public Podcaster? AssStab is a previously banned member of Bellgab. Also, she-he is in clear violation of the Terms of Service here at BG too, since he is constantly doxxing other members of BG he is in disagreement with.