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I love Bart Ell...he's clearly gay...

Started by chefist, November 19, 2018, 11:49:10 PM

Quote from: Catsmile on November 23, 2018, 12:09:09 AM
Yes. Thanks for the .gif of you while stalking falkie, for unknown years.

"Bullying the retard."  Now that's a name that I have not heard in a long, long time.  Two aught fourteen, mebbe fifteen.  I think it was around the time that Senda starting stealing food from churches.

WOTR

Quote from: DigitalPigSnuggler on November 22, 2018, 07:14:35 PM
and his commentary is less enjoyable than tying your urine catheter to a doorknob and slamming the door.
Is that the voice of experience?  :-\

Quote from: WOTR on November 23, 2018, 05:07:33 AM
Is that the voice of experience?  :-\

Yes, sort of.  I had an operation six years ago, a big one.  As luck would have it, I had an exceptionally vivid and realistic dream while under the anesthesia, where I was about to bag this Asian hottie.  Better than any regular dream.  Just as I was about to smack her the goods...yes, I woke up.  And the first words out of my mouth were, "Put me back down, I was about to score."

Even though I looked and felt like shit warmed over, I was still checking out the boobs and ass of every Asian woman who entered the recovery room.  "Would fuck."  "Ass built for anal."  "I'll bet she's a freak when we're alone."  For some reason unknown to me, they ended up putting me in the "CEO suite" as one nurse called it.  This room was fucking awesome.  Had it all to myself.  The bathroom and shower was bigger than entire hospital rooms I've stayed in.  Under other circumstances, I would have parlayed this fortuitous stature into a "recovering patient/naughty nurse" fantasy with the Viet nurse who worked on the night shift.  But it's kind of hard to be suave with a catheter running out of your wang and into a collection bottle.

I had been working my mojo on the Viet chick and it was going nowhere.  Eventually I concluded that she was a lesbo and gave up.  But prior to that, I made a little joke when she said that it was about time for the catheter to come out, about tying it to a doorknob as you would with a loose tooth.  "That's an interesting idea," she chirped ominously as she left the room.  I pretended to be asleep until her shift ended.  You can't be too careful with these lesbos.  That's why I steer clear of Roswells Art, if you've noticed.

My day shift nurse was a twenty-something American-born Muslim woman who wore a headscarf.  Not a beauty, but lithe in form, like an Asian chick.  I was really lucky to have her, because she was quite gentle, kind, and skilled.  She was the one that unhooked me from most of the tubes, including the drains and catheter, and the only nurse to actually handle my penor while I was conscious.

The only white nurse I had went out of her way to get a good long look at my junk when she didn't have to and I wasn't prepared for it.  Twice.  She also had a little accident while hooking up my IV and spilled my blood all over the herself and the floor.  Paladin, the next time you get an operation you should request her, she's just your type.  I think she was wearing a Lynyrd Skynyrd t-shirt under her scrubs.

pyewacket

Interesting story, DPS. Especially how the ass was built. These days you really should inspect the whole package and familiarize yourself with all the parts- sometime things are missing or have more than you expected.

Thank your maker they didn't put you back under because you may have seen this instead.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AoGLNKJK4sA

Quote from: pyewacket on November 24, 2018, 12:34:52 AM
Interesting story, DPS. Especially how the ass was built. These days you really should inspect the whole package and familiarize yourself with all the parts- sometime things are missing or have more than you expected.

Thank your maker they didn't put you back under because you may have seen this instead.



There's an awful lot of ladyboys here and I have to tell you that some of them are smoking hot.  I figured out the commercial when I saw his/her butt and hips.  There's nothing like a woman, pyewacket.  Maybe in a fantasy I'd fuck that guy, but not in real life.  You have to talk to them before and after, hold them, smooch on them, try for seconds in the shower.  The whole dynamic is different.  I'll take a woman every time.  Geez, I love women.  I love how they talk, how they smell, how they think.  I love how they think that once they've fucked you that they can steal food off your plate and wear your shirts.  I love how you name every restaurant within a forty mile radius and they turn them all down, and then say, "I don't know, where do YOU want to eat?"  even though I hate it.  I really love women.  Imma go get laid right now.   

WOTR

Quote from: DigitalPigSnuggler on November 24, 2018, 12:12:44 AM
Yes, sort of...
Thanks (I think.)  Quite the detailed reply.  I really cannot believe that pulling a catheter that way actually would occur to a person in real life.  Some things are better blocked from the imagination.

Dr. MD MD

Quote from: DigitalPigSnuggler on November 24, 2018, 01:06:38 AM
There's an awful lot of ladyboys here and I have to tell you that some of them are smoking hot.  I figured out the commercial when I saw his/her butt and hips.  There's nothing like a woman, pyewacket.  Maybe in a fantasy I'd fuck that guy, but not in real life.  You have to talk to them before and after, hold them, smooch on them, try for seconds in the shower.  The whole dynamic is different.  I'll take a woman every time.  Geez, I love women.  I love how they talk, how they smell, how they think.  I love how they think that once they've fucked you that they can steal food off your plate and wear your shirts.  I love how you name every restaurant within a forty mile radius and they turn them all down, and then say, "I don't know, where do YOU want to eat?"  even though I hate it.  I really love women.  Imma go get laid right now.

Yeah, you’re NOT gay! Just like Lee you LOVE women! :P

AZZERAE

This thread keeps getting gayer. What's next, soggy marie?



ItsOver

Quote from: Azzerae on November 24, 2018, 07:35:14 AM
This thread keeps getting gayer. What's next, soggy marie?


"I wouldn't know anything about that, silly boy."


pyewacket

Quote from: DigitalPigSnuggler on November 24, 2018, 01:06:38 AM
There's nothing like a woman, pyewacket.  You have to talk to them before and after, hold them, smooch on them, try for seconds in the shower.  The whole dynamic is different.  I'll take a woman every time.  Geez, I love women.  I love how they talk, how they smell, how they think.  I love how they think that once they've fucked you that they can steal food off your plate and wear your shirts.  I love how you name every restaurant within a forty mile radius and they turn them all down, and then say, "I don't know, where do YOU want to eat?"  even though I hate it.  I really love women.  Imma go get laid right now.

You rascal, DPS! Actually, some of that is sweet and I remember those days. However, as a couple ages together- things can get even better.

Another option would be a woman who will say, "No restaurant- where are your pots and pans?" She'll send you out for missing ingredients, cook you a fine meal, and spend a lovely evening at home with you.

Here's a tip that I taught Mr. Pye- if I'm watching the Hallmark station on TV- it's snuggly time (digital or analog)- if I'm watching Lifetime- then time to break out the lube!

I persuaded Mr. Pye to watch the A&E production of Pride and Prejudice with me. He tolerated it, but kept asking me what was going and who does she like, again? I finally told him to go back to his workshop and world more easily understood by him. Then I put one of his shirts on and ate his dessert.

Behold your future!  ;)

Tootsie

Quote from: Azzerae on November 24, 2018, 08:12:40 AM
You broke the rules: "All dude, no nude".

i got cuckshacked at Ellgab.. i should be a heroine here  :)

Asuka Langley

Quote from: Tootsie Wootsy on November 24, 2018, 11:29:48 AM
i got cuckshacked at Ellgab.. i should be a heroine here  :)

wait, which tootsie are you again? There are a few of you on ellgab right?

Dr. MD MD

Quote from: Kizuna Ai on November 24, 2018, 12:33:05 PM
wait, which tootsie are you again? There are a few of you on ellgab right?

She’s playing -5D chess.  ;)

WildCard

Quote from: Tootsie Wootsy on November 24, 2018, 11:29:48 AM
i got cuckshacked at Ellgab.. i should be a heroine here  :)

DynamoHum really ate your lunch, huh?

AZZERAE


Catsmile


DynamoHum

Quote from: WildCard on November 24, 2018, 12:52:25 PM
DynamoHum really ate your lunch, huh?

Throat punched her and stole her lunch money, get it right!

Tootsie

Quote from: DynamoHum on November 24, 2018, 02:40:48 PM
Throat punched her and stole her lunch money, get it right!

Heather Wade obsessed nut job.. dynamohum  lol


DynamoHum

Quote from: Tootsie Wootsy on November 24, 2018, 02:41:29 PM
Heather Wade obsessed nut job.. dynamohum  lol

You take the crown for nut jobs dear :)


Tootsie

Quote from: DynamoHum on November 24, 2018, 02:42:51 PM
You take the crown for nut jobs dear :)

obsessed with HEATHER WADE.. LOL  NUT JOB .. I'M JUST HAVIN FUN





Tootsie

Quote from: Azzerae on November 24, 2018, 02:58:05 PM
Why thank you!

thank you .. dynamohum is so fat she  could eat 10 groyper turds for lunch :o


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